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Some people think schools should select students on the basis of their marks. Others think they should be selected on the basis of talent. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think schools should select students on the basis of their marks. Others think they should be selected on the basis of talent. Pk1mK
School is an imperative part of a child’s life. There are certain people who insinuate that children should be given admission in the school solely on the basis of their grades. However, others believe that a child’s talent should be taken into consideration while giving admission and I think this view holds more weightage. Let us delve deeper into both the views along with my perception in the subsequent paragraphs. To begin with, due to some reasons, people think academic results are more important. Predominantly, the academic records show the cognitive abilities of a student. To explicate, if a child performs well in examination, it indicates he is good at learning things. Thus, creating a mind et of people that only a person with good grades can study well and become successful. For an instance, the competitive exams such as, NEET, UPSC, JEE are cleared by only those who have scored good marks in their high school. On contrary, not all students are good at academics and their intellectual abilities are more developed. Such kids possess numerous talents such as, dancing, singing, and painting. If these children are devoid of education in schools, they will not be able to learn about the things that are useful in daily life. For an instance, according to survey held in May, 2019 by UNESCO on a group of 500 people revealed that out of 500, 80% were not that good at studies and were more passionate about different things. If they were deprived of good education on the basis of marks, they would have never prospered. According to me. I opine that judging students bases on their academic scores is not only unfair to them, but also to the education system. Each and every child is special and possess a talent which needs to be explored and this can be done only with the right guidance. Besides, a person gets to learn a lot of things at school such as, cooperation and patience. To reiterate, it can be concluded that although giving admission on the basis of examination scores is not entirely incorrect, its demerits can not be ignored. If a system is built that takes into consideration both, the scores and the talent, it would create a positive change in education system.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
School
is an imperative part of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child’s
life. There are certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who insinuate that children should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
admission in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
solely
on the basis of their grades.
However
, others believe that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talent
should
be taken
into consideration while giving admission and I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this view holds more weightage.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
us delve deeper into both the views along with my perception in the subsequent paragraphs.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
results are more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.
Predominantly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
records
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
the cognitive abilities of a student. To explicate, if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
performs well in examination, it indicates he is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
at learning things.
Thus
, creating a mind
Possible spelling mistake found.
et
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
a person with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
grades can study well and become successful. For an instance, the competitive exams such as,
Possible spelling mistake found.
NEET
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
UPSC
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
JEE
are cleared
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
those who have scored
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
marks in their high school.

On contrary, not all students are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academics
and their intellectual abilities are more developed. Such kids possess numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talents
such as, dancing, singing, and painting. If these children are devoid of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
, they will not be able to learn about the things that are useful in daily life. For an instance, according to survey held in
When specifying a month and year, the comma is unnecessary: "May 2019".
May, 2019
by UNESCO on a group of 500
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
revealed that out of 500, 80% were not that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
at studies and were more passionate about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
things. If they
were deprived
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
on the basis of marks, they would have never prospered.

This phrase can sound awkward in English. Consider using "in my opinion" or "I think".
According to me
. I opine that judging students bases on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
scores is not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
unfair to them,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
system. Each and every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
is special and possess a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talent
which needs to
be explored
and this can
be done
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
with the right guidance.
Besides
, a person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
to learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
things at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
such as, cooperation and patience.

To reiterate, it can
be concluded
that although giving admission on the basis of examination scores is not
entirely
incorrect, its demerits can not be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
. If a system
is built
that takes into consideration both, the scores and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talent
, it would create a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
system.
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IELTS essay Some people think schools should select students on the basis of their marks. Others think they should be selected on the basis of talent.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
380 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
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