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Some people think money is one of the most essential factors in promoting happiness. Do you think people can be happy without much money? What are the other factors that contribute towards happiness?

Some people think money is one of the most essential factors in promoting happiness. Do you think people can be happy without much money? What are the other factors that contribute towards happiness? XM6w
Money is considered to be one of the most vital factors contributing to happiness. It is my opinion that people can be happy without much money and since there are other factors in life which can make a person feel happy. Other factors also contribute towards happiness. Money contributes towards material happiness. Financial stability and prosperity enable people to acquire materialistic things which can make them feel happy. For example, a person finally buying their dream car can contribute to happiness. However, money alone is not a major factor contributing to feeling happy. Money is an important aspect of life but financial well-being alone does not guarantee happiness. Neither are all the rich happy nor all the poor unhappy. Other factors also contribute towards happiness. For example, achievements can make a person feel happy. In a recent survey, it was established that people in developing countries are happier since they enjoy strong familial bonds compared to developed nations. Aspects of life such as job satisfaction, emotional stability are also contributors. For example, there are many involved in the field of medicine and law who derive happiness from their job by helping the downtrodden and poor. In addition, having a loving family and emotional support from this family is considered to be the highest source of happiness a person can have. To conclude, money alone is not the most important factor contributing to happiness. There are other factors such as job satisfaction, emotional support, and familial bonds are factors that give happiness to people.
Money
is considered
to be one of the most vital
factors
contributing to
happiness
. It is my opinion that
people
can be
happy
without much
money
and since there are other
factors
in life which can
make
a
person
feel
happy
. Other
factors
also
contribute
towards happiness.

Money
contributes
towards material
happiness
. Financial stability and prosperity enable
people
to acquire materialistic things which can
make
them feel
happy
.
For example
, a
person
finally
buying their dream car can
contribute
to
happiness
.
However
,
money
alone is not a major
factor
contributing to feeling
happy
.
Money
is an
important
aspect of life
but
financial well-being alone does not guarantee
happiness
. Neither are all the rich
happy
nor all the poor unhappy.

Other
factors
also
contribute
towards
happiness
.
For example
, achievements can
make
a
person
feel
happy
. In a recent survey, it
was established
that
people
in
developing countries
are happier since they enjoy strong familial bonds compared to developed nations. Aspects of life such as job satisfaction, emotional stability are
also
contributors.
For example
, there are
many
involved in the field of medicine and law who derive
happiness
from their job by helping the downtrodden and poor.
In addition
, having a loving family and emotional support from this family
is considered
to be the highest source of
happiness
a
person
can have.

To conclude
,
money
alone is not the most
important
factor
contributing to
happiness
. There are other
factors
such as job satisfaction, emotional support, and familial bonds are
factors
that give
happiness
to
people
.
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IELTS essay Some people think money is one of the most essential factors in promoting happiness. Do you think people can be happy without much money? What are the other factors that contribute towards happiness?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
253 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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