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Some people think competitive sport is important for a child’s education. Others think it has negative effects on children. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think competitive sport is important for a child’s education. Others think it has negative effects on children. eYYW
In this contemporary world, sports are playing an instrumental role in every one's life. And there are so many sports competition happen in day to doy life. Some people deem that sports are pivotal in child's life, whereas others think that it has bad impact on kids. In my way of thinking kids, I partially agee to the notion that sports are very important in kids life as well as it has some drawbacks. I will discuss both the views and give logical conclusion. To start with, there are manifold advantages to play sports. If students will play sports it will succor them in their mental growth as well as in physical health. For example, playing sports has help them to improve self-confidence and how to communicate with others, so pupils will improve their knowledge. Secondly, kids will know that how to face difficulties in small age, so they know how to face predicament situation. To playing competitive sports it will prove their mettle as well as team spirit and leadership. However, it is the way to show their hidden talent and open way of new career. On the other hand, some people think that it has negative impact on child, because if kids are playing sports whole the day, it will effect on their academic part. If children have no patience that it will impact on their mind as well as on their body, because some child has no idea about failure, so this things push them in depression and has mental breakdown. School going children have no maturity so they will not leave stone unturned to achieve that things and it has chance to prone series injuries. In conclusion, that parents should allow children to play sports but with some restrictions and also parents will scrupulous with their children activity. In my opinion, that kids will playing sports carefully and it will help them to achieve their goals.
In this contemporary world,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
an instrumental role in every one's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. And there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
competition happen in day to
Possible spelling mistake found.
doy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
deem that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
are pivotal in child's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, whereas others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
. In my way of thinking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
, I
partially
Possible spelling mistake found.
agee
to the notion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks. I will discuss both the views and give logical conclusion. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, there are manifold advantages to play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
. If students
Consider removing 'will'. (Usually, 'will' does not occur in a conditional clause, unless in the sense 'want to' or 'be willing to'.)
will play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
it will succor them in their mental growth as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as in physical health.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
self-confidence and how to communicate with others,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
pupils will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their knowledge.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
will know that how to face difficulties in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
age,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they know how to face predicament situation. To
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
competitive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
it will prove their mettle as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as team spirit and leadership.
However
, it is the way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their hidden talent and open way of new career.
On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on child,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
whole the day, it will
Did you mean "affect"?
effect
on their academic part. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
have no patience that it will impact on their mind as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as on their body,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
child has no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
about failure,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
Did you mean "these"?
this
things push them in depression and has mental breakdown. School going
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
have no maturity
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
stone unturned to achieve that things and it has chance to prone series injuries.
In conclusion
, that parents should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
restrictions and
also
parents will scrupulous with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
activity. In my opinion, that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
carefully
and it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to achieve their goals.
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IELTS essay Some people think competitive sport is important for a child’s education. Others think it has negative effects on children.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
320 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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