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Some people that unpaid community work shuld require to give teenagers in their free time. It is beneficial for community people as well as children. Do you agree or disagree?

Children are the backbone of the nation and how they flourish is a debatable issue. It is thought by certain individuals that youngsters ought to be required to do society work in their spare time without giving money to them which gives positive results for juveniles as well as community members. I am in consummate accord with this assertion that providing work to children by community is the best way of improvement. To embark with, the most conspicuous fact is to utilise children's spare time in a good way. Moreover, when public give work to adults in their recreational time then they do work with peer group and socialize them which means they learn cooperation and adjustment skills in working environment. To add in it, doing work by children without any pay is beneficial for community citizens. For an instance, any construction work is pending in society and due to less money panchayat members cannot improve these developments, if they provide this work to children in free time, and they do it without taking money. As a result, giving unpaid work to children by community is beneficial for society. Likewise, doing community work in homeland by adolescents is good for maintenance of health status of children. Furthermore, after school children stay in home which means they play video games and go for outings with friends in recreational time. This means to say that playing computer games. and eating junk food by children which impacts on heath and arise health hassls. Consequently, when children do work in leisure time then they stay healthy from health issues. To wrap up, some people ponder that teenagers have to give unpaid community work in free time is fruitful for both. Also, it aids for saving money of society and stay healthy as well.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
are the backbone of the nation and how they flourish is a debatable issue. It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
by certain individuals that youngsters ought to
be required
to do society
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in their spare
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
without giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to them which gives
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
results for juveniles
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
members. I am in consummate accord with this assertion that providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
is the best way of improvement.

To embark with, the most conspicuous fact is to
Possible spelling mistake. ‘utilise’ is British English.
utilise
children's spare
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
way.
Moreover
, when public give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
to adults in their recreational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
then they do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
with peer group and socialize them which means they learn cooperation and adjustment
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
in working environment. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
in it, doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
without any pay is beneficial for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
citizens. For an instance, any construction
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is pending in society and due to less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
Possible spelling mistake found.
panchayat
members cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
these developments, if they provide this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
in free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, and they do it without taking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
.
As a result
, giving unpaid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
is beneficial for society.

Likewise
, doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in homeland by adolescents is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for maintenance of health status of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Furthermore
, after school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
stay in home which means they play video games and go for outings with friends in recreational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. This means to say that playing computer games.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
and
eating junk food by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
which impacts on heath and arise health
Possible spelling mistake found.
hassls
.
Consequently
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
then they stay healthy from health issues.

To wrap up,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
ponder that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
give unpaid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
is fruitful for both.
Also
, it aids for saving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
of society and stay healthy
as well
.
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IELTS essay Some people that unpaid community work shuld require to give teenagers in their free time. It is beneficial for community people as well as children.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
299 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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