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Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.1

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. v. 1
Recently, it is more evident that many people are learning foreign languages. The most common ones are English, French, Chinese and Spanish. Some of the population is of the view that an individual should only learn a new language, if he or she has plans of travelling or working abroad while others beg to differ. This is because of the reasons given below; Learning a foreign language should be done if the person doing it, wants to travel or work in that country, because it would help them with the day to day activities like looking for accommodation, food or shopping. In countries like China, foreigners who cannot speak Mandarin are cheated by merchants who choose to double the prices of goods, since they think the aliens will not be able to notice due to language barrier. On the other hand, being able to speak more than one language, even if one chooses to stay in ones home country might come in handy for certain jobs. Currently, most nations have people of various cultures and nationalities. Most foreigners would want to hire a translator who is a national of whatever country they are in, but speaks their language. Also, many companies these days choose to hire applicants who are multilingual compared to those who are not. I would want to conclude with my opinion. I think an individual should endeavor to learn more than two languages not only for them to travel or work abroad, but also to learn more about other cultures and tradition, because the world is becoming one small community, all owing to the internet.
Recently, it is more evident that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are learning foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
. The most common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
are English, French, Chinese and Spanish.
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
Some of the
population is of the view that an individual should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
learn a new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
, if he or she has plans of travelling or working abroad while others beg to differ.

This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the reasons
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
below;

Learning a foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
should
be done
if the person doing it, wants to travel or work in that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them with the
It appears that two hyphens are missing.
day to day
activities like looking for accommodation, food or shopping. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
like China, foreigners
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
cannot speak Mandarin
are cheated
by merchants
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
choose to double the prices of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
, since they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the aliens will not be able to notice due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
barrier.

On the other hand
, being able to speak more than one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
, even if one chooses to stay in
Did you mean "one's"?
ones
home
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
in handy for certain jobs.
Currently
, most nations have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
of various cultures and nationalities. Most foreigners would want to hire a translator
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
is a national of whatever
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
they are in,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
speaks their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
.
Also
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
these days choose to hire applicants
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are multilingual compared to those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are not.

I would want
to conclude
with my opinion. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
an individual should endeavor to learn more than two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for them to travel or work abroad,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to learn more about other cultures and tradition,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the world is becoming one
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
community, all owing to the internet.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
Change your language and you change your thoughts.
Karl Albrecht

IELTS essay Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
268 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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