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Some people say that the extinction of plants and animals is the biggest environmental threat we face today. I agree with this matter but I think the biggest problem is climate change. discuss both views and give opinion

Some people say that the extinction of plants and animals is the biggest environmental threat we face today. I agree with this matter but I think the biggest problem is climate change. discuss both views and give opinion 0lKdn
Some people say that the extinction of plants and animals is the biggest environmental threat we face today. I agree with this matter but I think the biggest problem is climate change. The loss of some plants and animals will break the food chain and cause problems. For example, when predatory animals like tigers at the top of the pyramid disappear, it will lead to an uncontrollable increase in the number of herbivores. The loss can be caused by nature or human activity but based on my opinion, human activity is the biggest cause. On the other hand, climate change is caused by human activity too and it's an even bigger challenge. Because of the pollution and the green house gas effect, global temperatures are rising then the polar ice is melting. It causes sea levels increase. The world are already facing the risk of getting submerged in the oceans, especially coastal cities. Climate change also leads to more frequent occurrences of droughts and flooding. This affects food production and health problems for humans and animals. If the temperature continues to rise at this pace, the planet may become inhabitable in the future. In conclusion, the extinction of wildlife and the loss of biodiversity are big issues. However, climate change and the associated problems are even bigger challenges as they can threaten the existence of life on the planet.
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Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
say that the extinction of plants and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
is the biggest environmental threat we face
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today
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this matter
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the biggest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
is
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climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
.

The loss of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
plants and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
will break the food chain and cause
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
.
For example
, when predatory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
like tigers at the top of the pyramid disappear, it will lead to an uncontrollable increase in the number of herbivores. The loss can
be caused
by nature or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
activity
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
based on my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
activity is the biggest cause.

On the other hand
,
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climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
is caused
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
activity too and it's an even bigger challenge.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of the pollution and the green
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
gas effect, global temperatures are rising then the polar ice is melting. It causes sea levels increase. The world are already facing the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of getting submerged in the oceans,
especially
coastal cities.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
also
leads to more frequent occurrences of droughts and flooding. This affects food production and health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
. If the temperature continues to rise at this pace, the planet may become inhabitable in the future.

In conclusion
, the extinction of wildlife and the loss of biodiversity are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
issues.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
and the associated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
are even bigger challenges as they can threaten the existence of life on the planet.

IELTS essay Some people say that the extinction of plants and animals is the biggest environmental threat we face today. I agree with this matter but I think the biggest problem is climate change. discuss both views and give opinion

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
229 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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