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Some people say that student should live In a dormitory but Others claim that they may choose where they want . To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that student should live In a dormitory but Others claim that they may choose where they want. PXjyp
In this contemporary era, education system is very developing and there are all student try to active in education fields. Therefore, more and more people think that students ought to live in dormitory. While, others believe that they have a chance to choose what kind of accommadition to live. And l totally agree with this opinion. To embarking with, there are several worthwhile reason why students should choose themselves what kind of accomadition to live. First and foremost, it is more convinent for students to live other places that they want. Because, in the domitories are not cosy as other places and it has not so many opportunities that neccessary to live for students such as there are several rooms and there are not perfect and very very small and room' s condition is poor. Moreover, one room for seven or eight students and without a doubt, it is difficult to live this condition. In addition to this, in winter these rooms are very cold because there are heating system is wrong and there are foods are not good so that students immune system is poor. As a result these conditions can be negative effect their education. On the other hand, although there are some detremental sides of living dormitory for students, we can not refuse it is benefits. For example, these accommaditions are very suitable for students because it is cheaper than other buildings and there all opportunities to live. Furthermore, especially in this modern world these buildings are constracting with all qualities such as isolate bathroom, bedroom and kitchen for both gender. To sum up, domitories are very suitable and usefull for all students to live becuase of cheaper. But, the best choice for students, they should choose what kind of accommadition to live for them, according to their financial situation.
In this contemporary era, education system is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
developing and there are all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
try to active in education fields.
Therefore
, more and more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
ought to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in dormitory.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
, others believe that they have a chance to choose what kind of
Possible spelling mistake found.
accommadition
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
. And l
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this opinion.

To embarking with, there are several worthwhile reason why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should choose themselves what kind of
Possible spelling mistake found.
accomadition
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
.
First
and foremost, it is more
Possible spelling mistake found.
convinent
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
places that they want.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
, in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
domitories
are not
Possible spelling mistake. 'cosy' is British English.
cosy
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
places and it has not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
opportunities that
Possible spelling mistake found.
neccessary
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
such as there are several rooms and there are not perfect and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
and room' s condition is poor.
Moreover
, one room for seven or eight
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and without a doubt, it is difficult to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
this condition.
In addition
to this, in winter these rooms are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there are heating system is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
and there are foods are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
immune system is poor.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
a result these conditions can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect their education.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, although there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Possible spelling mistake found.
detremental
sides of living dormitory for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, we can not refuse it is benefits.
For example
, these
Possible spelling mistake found.
accommaditions
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
suitable for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is cheaper than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
buildings and there all opportunities to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
.
Furthermore
,
especially
in this modern world these buildings are
Possible spelling mistake found.
constracting
with all qualities such as isolate bathroom, bedroom and kitchen for both gender.

To sum up,
Possible spelling mistake found.
domitories
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
suitable and
Possible spelling mistake found.
usefull
for all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
Possible spelling mistake found.
becuase
of cheaper.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, the best choice for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, they should choose what kind of
Possible spelling mistake found.
accommadition
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
for them, according to their financial situation.
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IELTS essay Some people say that student should live In a dormitory but Others claim that they may choose where they want.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
303 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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