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Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organized group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is sometimes argued that children should acquire the ability to entertain themselves alone. Although I think that there is a place for this, I prefer the view of those who believe that children ought to be encouraged to participate in activities that are arranged for groups. It is suggested by some that it is beneficial for children to do solitary activities in their free time because this can improve their concentration skills. Reading is the most obvious example of an activity requiring this ability and it is likely that it will help children with studying for difficult exams. However, when left to their own devices, many children tend to spend too much time on one preferred activity. Alternatively, they may drift into unhealthy pursuits, such as violent video games. As a result, I feel that parents should ensure that the time that children spend alone on leisure is limited. Despite the positives of activities pursued alone, I agree with those who see a variety of advantages for children from arranged group activities. One such activity is camping trips organized by scouting associations, where they can be trained in how to erect tents and other useful practical skills. This activity and sports like football also teach children to respect authority of leaders and to collaborate with others to achieve specific goals. All these skills make a significant contribution to the development of young people into responsible adults. As such, I believe that most of their free time should be dedicated to organized group activities. In conclusion, while solitary leisure activities have some value for children, I am firmly of the view that parents ought to make sure that a significant amount of their leisure time is devoted to group activities.
It is
sometimes
argued that
children
should acquire the ability to entertain themselves alone. Although I
think
that there is a place for this, I prefer the view of those who believe that
children
ought to
be encouraged
to participate in
activities
that
are arranged
for groups.

It
is suggested
by
some
that it is beneficial for
children
to do solitary
activities
in their free
time
because
this can
improve
their concentration
skills
. Reading is the most obvious example of an
activity
requiring this
ability and
it is likely that it will
help
children
with studying for difficult exams.
However
, when
left
to their
own
devices,
many
children
tend to spend too much
time
on one preferred
activity
.
Alternatively
, they may drift into unhealthy pursuits, such as violent video games.
As a result
, I feel that parents should ensure that the
time
that
children
spend alone on leisure
is limited
.

Despite the positives of
activities
pursued alone, I
agree
with those who
see
a variety of advantages for
children
from arranged group
activities
. One such
activity
is camping trips organized by scouting associations, where they can
be trained
in how to erect tents and other useful practical
skills
. This
activity
and sports like football
also
teach
children
to respect authority of leaders and to collaborate with others to achieve specific goals. All these
skills
make
a significant contribution to the development of young
people
into responsible adults. As such, I believe that most of their free
time
should
be dedicated
to organized group activities.

In conclusion
, while solitary leisure
activities
have
some
value for
children
, I am
firmly
of the view that parents ought to
make
sure that a significant amount of their leisure
time
is devoted
to group
activities
.
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IELTS essay Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organized group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
290 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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