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Some people say that Olympic volunteers should be paid. Others, however, believe that these volunteers should not be paid. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that Olympic volunteers should be paid. Others, however, believe that these volunteers should not be paid. N8mG2
It is argued that volunteers for Olympic should be charged. While some individuals think that the committee does not need to pay for these people. In my respective, I totally agree with this view. On the one hand, people working for free for Olympic need to be paid as they have to fulfil many tasks and cover a lot of costs. During the time for Olympic, volunteers do a lot of work such as guiding athletes around, greeting the government or translating for lots of fans. Therefore, giving them money is a good way to compensate them for what they did for this event. Futhermore, they also need to pay for cost of living by themselves like housing and transportation. If Olympic volunteers do not have financial supports, they may have difficulty continuing to do their work. For instance, Olympic is held in Tokyo, a place which has expensive costs, is a big concern to some volunteers to live here during the time for Olympic. On the other hand, I believe that the organization of Olympic does not need to pay for volunteers because of many reasons. Many peole who wants to work for Olympic does not think of how much money they can get and this can be explained why the International Olympic Committee has received over 200, 000 applications from people wanting to volunteer for 2020 Tokyo Olympics and Paralympics. Instead of concern about money, people think about other ( thêm tisnht ừ bổ nghĩa) benefits from these events which not only travelling to many countries but also getting new experience. If they are paid, it may make the decline of the number of people who volunteers for Olympic. In conclusion, while many people think individuals who works for free for olympic ought to be paid, it seems to me that they do not work because of money, but for other benefits instead and as a result, the committee does not have responsibility for giving money.
It
is argued
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteers
for Olympic should
be charged
. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that the committee
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
does
not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to pay for these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. In my respective, I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this view.

On the one hand,
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people
working for free for Olympic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to
be paid
as they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
fulfil
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
tasks and cover
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
costs. During the time for Olympic,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteers
do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
such as guiding athletes around, greeting the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
or translating for lots of fans.
Therefore
, giving them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
way to compensate them for what they did for this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Futhermore
, they
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to pay for cost of living by themselves like housing and transportation. If Olympic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteers
do not have financial supports, they may have difficulty continuing to do their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
.
For instance
, Olympic
is held
in Tokyo, a place which has expensive costs, is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
concern to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteers
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
here during the time for Olympic.

On the other hand
, I believe that the organization of Olympic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
does
not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to pay for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
Possible spelling mistake found.
peole
who wants to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
for Olympic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
does
not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
of how much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
and this can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explained
why the International Olympic Committee has received over 200, 000 applications from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
wanting to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteer
for 2020 Tokyo Olympics and Paralympics.
Instead
of concern about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
about other
Don't put a space after the opening parenthesis
(
Possible spelling mistake found.
thêm
Possible spelling mistake found.
tisnht
ừ
Possible spelling mistake found.
bổ
Possible spelling mistake found.
nghĩa
) benefits from these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
which not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
travelling to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
getting new experience. If they
are paid
, it may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the decline of the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteers
for Olympic.

In conclusion
, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
individuals who
Did you mean "work"? Alternatively, check whether the singular of 'individuals' should be used.
works
for free for
Possible spelling mistake found.
olympic
ought to
be paid
, it seems to me that they do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
for other benefits
instead
and
as a result
, the committee
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
does
not have responsibility for giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
.
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IELTS essay Some people say that Olympic volunteers should be paid. Others, however, believe that these volunteers should not be paid.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
328 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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