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Some people say that nowdays children have an easy life and some people think that children in the past had easier life

Some people say that nowdays children have an easy life and some people think that children in the past had easier life Dw1yk
People have different opinion about children having uncomplicated life both in the old days and currently. While some people believe that kids in the past had an easy life owing to the fact that parents shared the responsibility of raising them up, others believe life is more easier for the modern child due to invention in technology which has exposed them to digital platforms. On one hand, during the past most parents were always at home taking care of their kids. Most women were incharge of young girls teaching them hands-on activities and instilling moral habits in them, whereas young boys could spend time with their father either hunting food for family or looking after grazing cattles. This enabled them acquire skills to help them adapt easily and live harmoniously in the society. For example, girls were taught how to spin yarn and make cloths for their family members. Therefore, long ago kids had an easy life since their parents taught them basic skills for survival in the community. On the other hand, technology has simplified life for the modern youngsters due to the availability of computers for their use. This has allowed them to access the internet and explore the world virtually at the comfort of their parents home. Using a tablet a kid can access various shows which keeps them engaged, teach them new skills that enhances their cognitive development. For example, research shows that children who watch cartoons improve their language knowledge and communication skills. Thus digital media has led to a trouble free lifestyle for the current generation. In conclusion, some individuals believe that children in the past had undemanding life since theirs parents taught them skills, while others think that development in technology has led to an easy lifestyle for the youngsters of today.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
opinion about children having uncomplicated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
both in the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
days and
currently
. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
in the past had an easy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
owing to the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
shared the responsibility of raising them up, others believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is
Use only "easier" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more easier
for the modern child due to invention in technology which has exposed them to digital platforms.

On one hand, during the past most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
were always at home taking care of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
. Most women were
Possible spelling mistake found.
incharge
of young girls teaching them hands-on activities and instilling moral habits in them, whereas young boys could spend time with their father either hunting food for family or looking after grazing
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "cattle", the plural form of the noun 'cattle'?
cattles
. This enabled them acquire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them adapt
easily
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
harmoniously
in the society.
For example
, girls
were taught
how to spin yarn and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
cloths for their family members.
Therefore
, long ago
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
had an easy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
since their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
taught them basic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
for survival in the community.

On the other hand
, technology has simplified
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
for the modern youngsters due to the availability of computers for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
. This has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
them to access the internet and explore the world
virtually
at the comfort of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
home. Using a tablet a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kid
can access various
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
them engaged, teach them new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
that enhances their cognitive development.
For example
, research
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that children who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
cartoons
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their language knowledge and communication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
digital media has led to a trouble free lifestyle for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
generation.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals believe that children in the past had undemanding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
since theirs
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
taught them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
, while others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that development in technology has led to an easy lifestyle for the youngsters of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
.
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IELTS essay Some people say that nowdays children have an easy life and some people think that children in the past had easier life

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
299 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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