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Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for you your answer and include any relevant example from your knowledge and experienc.

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. with this opinion? Give reasons for you your answer and include any relevant example from your knowledge and experienc. yXG1r
India is land of diversities, a land of countless mannerisms and it offers opulent cultural heritage. India is a country which has 29 states, totally different from each other. Each state has its own culture, rituals and songs. Music is something that connect people of different cultures and religions. This essay will tall about the merits that connect citizens of different country or culture to each other. Firstly, music is an epitome of piece and can create unity among each other, as in India people highly participate in each and every festivals with gusto and elate. The greatness of a culture can be found in its festivals, so people enjoy it in a jubilant way. Music can truly adorn a culture, as it can be very helpful in resolving the conflicts with each other. Moreover, if we talk on a micro level its helps one individual to calm ones mind and body and leads to diminish the adverse affects owing to depression. In addition, music can also improve the economical relations of different counties in this belligerent world. Many Pop starts or singers prefer to do their world tours and go to different countries for their live shows. That can accelerate countries economical powers at some level. On the other hand, music can cause conflicts in relations, every individual is different from each other so their choice of songs are also different. Some people can get hurt by others choice of music that can lead to formidable and capricious problems in ones relation. Music should be a thing that always unities people and and cause enjoyments instead of conflicts. Music can be a good source of knowledge of different cultures and religions.
India is land of diversities, a land of countless mannerisms and it offers opulent cultural heritage. India is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
which has 29 states,
totally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
from each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
. Each state has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
, rituals and songs.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Music
is something that connect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
and religions. This essay will tall about the merits that connect citizens of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
to each other.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is an epitome of piece and can create unity among each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
, as in India
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
highly
participate in each and every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "festival"?
festivals
with gusto and elate. The greatness of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
can
be found
in its festivals,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
enjoy it
Consider replacing "in a jubilant way" with the adverb for "jubilant"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in a jubilant way
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Music
can
truly
adorn a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
, as it can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
helpful in resolving the conflicts with each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
.
Moreover
, if we talk on a micro level its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
one individual to calm
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
mind and body and leads to diminish the adverse affects owing to depression.

In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
can
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
Did you mean "economic" (=connected with economy)?
economical
relations of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
counties in this belligerent world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
Pop
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
or singers prefer to do their world tours and go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
. That can accelerate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
economical powers at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
level.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
can cause conflicts in relations, every individual is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
from each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
their choice of songs are
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
hurt by others choice of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
that can lead to formidable and capricious problems in
Did you mean "one's"?
ones
relation.

Music should be a thing that always unities
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Possible typo: you repeated a word
and and
cause enjoyments
instead
of conflicts.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Music
can be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
source of knowledge of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
and religions.
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IELTS essay Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. with this opinion? Give reasons for you your answer and include any relevant example from your knowledge and experienc.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
282 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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