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Some people say that museums should show local culture but some says museums should show foreign culture. Discuss both view and gove your opinion

Some people say that museums should show local culture but some says museums should show foreign culture. Discuss both view and gove your opinion RyryG
since past few decades what should be included in meseum hasalways sparked headed conmovecies some people ofine that museums show local values and otherbelieve in showing foreign allemal. Both diversions of this essay will discores in aforementioned paragraphs. an the one hand, people who beeliens that museums and art galleries replay leah histoires and cultural values claim this would encourage the vast number of nations. This is because, the forelove people like to enchance and watch the displays which are showed by the museums and art galleries secondly, by showing own culture if will help to enchance the knousledge of the new generation. Therefore, according to this group of people museums and art galleries shows the local values. On the other hand, people who as que art galleries and mis ons display the foreign cultural and historical values state that in this way the people gain knowledge of the other countriesFor example, in the madame tussauds museums display the wax statuee of the entertainment personalities from the different countries due to this, the person gain knowledge regarding the famous people of many countries By analysis aformention wells, I firmly believe that museums und ant galleries show theis local values fate attract the visitors,
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
since
past few decades what should
be included
in
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meseum
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hasalways
sparked headed
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conmovecies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people


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ofine
that museums
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
local values and
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otherbelieve
in showing foreign
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allemal
. Both

diversions of this essay will
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discores
in aforementioned paragraphs.

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an
the one hand,
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people
who
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beeliens
that

museums and art galleries replay
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leah
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histoires


and cultural values claim this would

encourage the vast number of nations.

This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, the
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forelove
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people
like

to
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enchance
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
the displays

which are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
by the

museums and art galleries
secondly
,

by showing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
culture if will

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
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enchance
the
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knousledge
of

the new generation.
Therefore
, according to

this group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
museums and art galleries

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
the local values.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who as
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que


art galleries and
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mis ons
display the

foreign cultural and historical values

state that in this way the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
gain knowledge of the other
Possible spelling mistake found.
countriesFor
example, in the madame
Possible spelling mistake found.
tussauds


museums display the wax
Possible spelling mistake found.
statuee


of the entertainment personalities

from the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries due

to this, the person gain knowledge

regarding the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries

By analysis
Possible spelling mistake found.
aformention
wells, I
firmly


believe that museums
Possible spelling mistake found.
und
ant

galleries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
Possible spelling mistake found.
theis
local values

fate attract the visitors,
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IELTS essay Some people say that museums should show local culture but some says museums should show foreign culture. Discuss both view and gove your opinion

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
203 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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