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Some people say that money is not necessary for happiness of our country. Others say rich economy helps in bringing happiness to our country. Argue both side of the case.

Some people say that money is not necessary for happiness of our country. Others say rich economy helps in bringing happiness to our country. Argue both side of the case. MmN8p
Human beings always aspire for a better life. As civilization grew and democratic and other liberal system of government replaced despotic rulers, the laity understood its own worth. As the result, the government are chosen, after the evolution of facilitation which they may cater to public. Governments, in their turn to furnish amenities, need money. It is general perception that more the money a government would have better may be the services to people. Some opulent nations around the world have been able to provide all basic amenities such as food, shelter, medicines and education to their people whereas some deprived nations have plodded to generate these services. The multitude nation nowadays demands not only the basic amenities but also superficial luxuries. Comfort such as easy transportations, superior infrastructures, pension plans, government loans, quality foods are a few facilitations that people aspire for. All these amenities, along with many others, can only be catered with wealth. So if a nation may have money it can better serve to wants of its denizens. What is more, that satiates that basic necessities of its residents provides a better chance to the people to have more leisure with the money that people earn for themselves. People, with more opportunities to spend for fun with kiths and kin, feel more contentment. Garnering these small efforts from government, one can get a general idea about the happiness of the people. For example developed countries such as USA, UK, Canada offer all basic amenities such as medical, education etc. To their people thus citizen in these nations are considered happier in comparison to the citizens of underdeveloped nations. On the other hand, there are people, who believe that countries with more money have never been able to provide pragmatic happiness to the dwellers. They rather believe that when people get all facilitations without much ado, start feeling complacent. By this smug attitude, people become hackneyed. They start expecting to be done by governments; this in turn leads to make people torpid. Such characters, transferring from individuals to groups or communities, can be really jeopardous for the development of whole nation. An epitome for this can be the recent fall Greece where government kept providing benefits of high pensions, handsome salaries & attractive facilities to its citizens, but all this was provided being heedless to looming fiscal deficits and loans, and this, in turn, ultimately brought the country to brink monetary breakdown. To pen down, though this is important for government to have adequate money so as to serve its citizens with basic amenities, yet candid attributes should also be inculcated in people. After all, we must know money can buy luxuries not happiness.
Human beings always aspire for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
life. As civilization grew and democratic and other liberal system of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
replaced despotic rulers, the laity understood its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
worth. As the result, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
are chosen
, after the evolution of facilitation which they may cater to public.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Governments
, in their turn to furnish amenities, need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
. It is general perception that more the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
would have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
may be the services to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
opulent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
around the world have been able to provide all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
basic
amenities such as food, shelter, medicines and education to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
whereas
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
deprived
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
have plodded to generate these services. The multitude
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
nowadays demands not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
basic
amenities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
superficial luxuries. Comfort such as easy transportations, superior infrastructures, pension plans,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
loans, quality foods are a few
Possible spelling mistake found.
facilitations
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
aspire for. All these amenities, along with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
others, can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be catered
with wealth.
“So if” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
So if
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
may have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
it can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
serve to wants of its denizens.

What is more
, that satiates that
Consider using "necessities".
basic necessities
of its residents provides a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
chance to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to have more leisure with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
earn for themselves.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
, with more opportunities to spend for fun with
Possible spelling mistake found.
kiths
and kin, feel more contentment. Garnering these
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
efforts from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
, one can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a general
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
about the happiness of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For example
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
such
A determiner is probably missing here: "as the USA".
as USA
, UK, Canada
The singular proper name 'Canada' must be used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "offers", "offered".
offer
all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
basic
amenities such as medical, education etc. To their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
thus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizen
in these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
are considered
happier
in comparison
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
of underdeveloped nations.

On the other hand
, there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, who believe that countries with more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
have never been able to provide pragmatic happiness to the dwellers. They
rather
believe that when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
all
Possible spelling mistake found.
facilitations
without much ado,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
feeling complacent. By this smug attitude,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
become hackneyed. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
expecting to
be done
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
; this in turn leads to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
torpid. Such characters, transferring from individuals to groups or communities, can be
really
Possible spelling mistake found.
jeopardous
for the development of whole
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
. An epitome for this can be the recent fall Greece where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
providing benefits of high pensions, handsome salaries & attractive facilities to its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
all this
was provided
being heedless to looming fiscal deficits and loans, and this, in turn,
ultimately
brought the country to brink monetary breakdown.

To pen down, though this is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to have adequate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
'So as to' expresses purpose and is used in formal texts. Consider using "to"
so as to
serve its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
basic
amenities,
yet
candid attributes should
also
be inculcated
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
After all
, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
know
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
luxuries not happiness.
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IELTS essay Some people say that money is not necessary for happiness of our country. Others say rich economy helps in bringing happiness to our country. Argue both side of the case.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
447 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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