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Some people say that modern technology has made shopping today easier, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion

People are divided on two sides, some hold the opinion that shopping has become easier nowadays due to modern technology, whereas other think that reverse is occurred. In this essay, i shall analysis both views. Personally, both prospectives are equally valid. On one hand, there are many reasons why advanced inventions have benefit impact on shopping process. In other Words, new applications start to appear to enhance buying any product. Consequently, people can order anything they want from several shops without wasting their time on going to the place. For instance, Amazon Online shopping website which has multi options to choose by only access to the application, and only by one click any their choice is selecting and deliver to home. One the other hand, Online shopping has drawbacks which contributes easy buying. In details, despite the benefit role of advanced technology, but the shipping time for receiving any order is so long which make many consumers think before they decide to buy because they maybe want this item urgently. For example, Jumia online shopping website needs at least 15 days to deliver the product to home due to the time for shipping that lead to difficulty in receive any order. In Summary, I would like to conclude that modern technology recently has vital impact on shopping which enhance the process of buying and selling by applied new applications. In Contrast, the online shopping has some concerns about easy shipping because it takes several times to send the product to the consumer. For those reasons, both views are acceptable for me.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
are divided
on two sides,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
hold the opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
has become easier nowadays due to modern technology, whereas other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that reverse
is occurred
. In this essay,
Did you mean “I”?
i
The word ‘analysis’ is a noun or an adjective. A verb or adverb is missing or misspelled here, or maybe a comma is missing.
shall analysis
both views.
Personally
, both
Possible spelling mistake found.
prospectives
are
equally
valid.

On one hand, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons why advanced inventions have benefit impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
process.
In other Words
, new applications
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to appear to enhance buying any product.
Consequently
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can order anything they want from several shops without wasting their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on going to the place.
For instance
, Amazon
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
website which has multi options to choose by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
access to the application, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
by one click
A determiner cannot be combined with a possessive pronoun. Did you mean simply “any” or “their”?
any their
choice is selecting and deliver to home.

Did you mean “on”?
One
the other hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
has drawbacks which contributes easy buying. In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
, despite the benefit role of advanced technology,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the shipping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for receiving any order is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
long which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
consumers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
they decide to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they maybe want this item
urgently
.

For example
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Jumia
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
website needs at least 15 days to deliver the product to home due to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for shipping that lead to difficulty in receive any order.

In Summary, I would like
to conclude
that modern technology recently has vital impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
which enhance the process of buying and selling by applied new applications.
In Contrast
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
concerns about easy shipping
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it takes several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
the product to the consumer. For those reasons, both views are acceptable for me.

IELTS essay Some people say that modern technology has made shopping today easier, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
261 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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