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Some people say that living in a big city is better than living in the countryside. What is your opinion?

Some people say that living in a big city is better than living in the countryside. What is your opinion? k5paK
Nowadays, people are moving to modern urban where is more convenient and more advantage than the town, In my opinion, I believe that living urban will be brought more benefit than the countryside. This essay will discuss two reasons which are modern technologies and the chance to get a job. The first reason, the city is provided with a lot of modern technologies very fast, which they communicate together on the internet. They make new equipment that humans can keep up with modern society. For example; each year, there are new phones to provide people that have multiple functions for each other. On the other hand, they limit to provide in the countryside, why people can not have enough money to pay the highest cost. The second reason, the opportunity to find a job in the big city is easier. Therefore, there are restaurants, hospitals, companies. . . , they need more employees. However, you can easily get a job in your hometown, you can not get high salary than urban and the chance is fewer In conclusion, modern technologies and opportunities are reasons, which I choose to live in the city. I think it depends on the life living of each person
Nowadays,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are moving to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
urban where is more convenient and more advantage than the town, In my opinion, I believe that living urban will
be brought
more benefit than the countryside. This essay will discuss two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
which are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
technologies and the chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a job.

The
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
, the city
is provided
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
technologies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
, which they communicate together on the internet. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
new equipment that humans can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
up with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
society.
For example
; each year, there are new phones to provide
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
that have multiple functions for each other.
On the other hand
, they limit to provide in the countryside, why
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
money to pay the highest cost.

The second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
, the opportunity to find a job in the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
city is easier.
Therefore
, there are restaurants, hospitals,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Loose punctuation mark.
,
they need more employees.
However
, you can
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a job in your hometown, you can not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
high salary than urban and the chance is fewer

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
technologies and opportunities are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
, which I choose to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the city. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it depends on the life living of each
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
person
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IELTS essay Some people say that living in a big city is better than living in the countryside. What is your opinion?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
202 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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