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some people say that as you can watch any film online nobody will go to the cinema in the future

some people say that as you can watch any film online nobody will go to the cinema in the future GwdWo
I disagree with the idea that as you can watch any film online nobody will go to the cinema in the future. I have some several arguments to support my opinion. Forst of all, always when people invents something new, they have fears that old will disappear. For example: when photography was invented they thought that painting would disappear, when e-books were invented they thought that paper books would disappear. But non of them happened, and they developed peacefully. Moreover, we live in the era of globalization. It's much cheaper to watch movie online instead of going to the cinema. There are people who prefer prefer watching movies online and there are people who prefer watching movies at the cinema. These are the reasons why i disagree that as you can watch any film online nobody will go to the cinema in the future.
I disagree with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that as you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
any film
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
nobody will go to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinema
in the future. I have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
several arguments to support my opinion.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Forst
of all, always when
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
invents
something new, they have fears that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
will disappear.
For example
: when photography
was invented
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that painting would disappear, when e-books
were invented
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that paper books would disappear.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
non of them happened, and they developed
peacefully
.
Moreover
, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the era of globalization. It's much cheaper to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
movie
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
instead
of going to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinema
. There are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
Possible typo: you repeated a word
prefer prefer
watching movies
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
and there are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who prefer watching movies at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinema
. These are the reasons why
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
disagree that as you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
any film
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
nobody will go to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinema
in the future.

IELTS essay some people say that as you can watch any film online nobody will go to the cinema in the future

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
144 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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