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some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things.Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it discuss both views and give your own opinion

some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it discuss both views and give your own opinion oMgX
Many people believe that advertising become a part of our daily life, so people ignore them. While others are sure that notice is perfect way to buy product. I am in opinion, meanwhile, that commercials help us to identity the quality products and purchase them. In the one hand, the adv, which are seen on billboards or Internet, assist people to determine the popular goods and buy brands for being on trend. Miscellaneous companies attempt customs perceive aesthetically pleasant owing to adding harmonic music, vivid colors or even celebrities who are loved by public. For instance, corporations of electronic equipment, such as smartphones, manipulate people by catchy music, sophisticated designs and high quality camera, when camera is one of the relevant feature of the gadget. As a result, persuasive adv is method of lure the customs. On the other hand, adv is so deceptive that provokes to buy product which people do not need. Therefore, people ignore them to avoiding the temptation. The another reason, which irritates public, is wasting time. For example, some viewers change the TV channel when adv break begins. Similarly, advertisements are skipped when it starts during the video on YouTube. In consequence, people do not trust pop-up adv, inasmuch as they rely on own experience or others advices. In conclusion, although people may have varying opinions. I am of the opinion that advertisement can have a persuasive effect on the majority of people, whereas it might contain useful information or even discover the solving of problems.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that advertising become a part of our daily life,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
them.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
others are sure that notice is
Please check whether an article is missing: "a perfect".
perfect
way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
product. I am in opinion, meanwhile, that commercials
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to identity the quality products and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
them.

In the one hand, the adv, which are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
on billboards or Internet, assist
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to determine the popular
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
brands for being on trend. Miscellaneous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
attempt customs perceive
aesthetically
pleasant owing to adding harmonic music, vivid colors or even celebrities who are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
by public.
For instance
, corporations of electronic equipment, such as smartphones, manipulate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
by catchy music, sophisticated designs and high quality camera, when camera is one of the relevant feature of the gadget.
As a result
, persuasive adv is method of lure the customs.

On the other hand
, adv is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
deceptive that provokes to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
product which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not need.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
them to avoiding the temptation. The another reason, which irritates public, is wasting time.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
viewers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the TV channel when adv break
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begins
.
Similarly
, advertisements
are skipped
when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
during the video on YouTube. In consequence,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not trust pop-up adv, inasmuch as they rely on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
experience or others advices.

In conclusion
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
may have varying opinions. I am of the opinion that advertisement can have a persuasive effect on the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, whereas it might contain useful information or even discover the solving of problems.
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IELTS essay some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it discuss both views and give your own opinion

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
251 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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