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Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these view and give your own opinion.

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. o00V
In this ultra-modern era, we always surrounded with advertisement. Group of people opine that advert prosperously lead consumer toward shopping items. However, other section of society believe that advertising always normal, we should not provide much importance to them. While I personally believe and support to former view. On the one hand, the reason behind the advertisement completely succeed to lead consumer to the product. Firstly, it provide latest information about new launched product to the buyer. We could familiar with fresh launch product when we see promotion on the different media like television, radio or the internet. Otherwise we could not know about millions of new launch product. Secondly, it become guide by providing unique specification and detail of the product, which will help us in the selection of proper product as per our requirement. Finally, it is so much informative and entertainer. It have enormous new idea and thought, also there are impact full social messages which will greatly impact on common public. On the other hand, There are also group of society believe that we should not give so much important to advertisement because, Most advert always repetitive and continuously snow bowling on us. This kind of situation very irritating. Moreover it is lead toward over shopping which will generate shopaholic society. Furthermore, it disturb us in each and every activity, when we watching television or searching over internet. For instance, when we watching our favorite movie and going to reveling suspense that time break will come and disturb us, which is very painful and vesting our precious time. In conclusion, We are living with promotional society, promotions might bother us with continuous repeating things and promote us to extra shopping and wastage time, while I firmly believe that if we deal with judiciously then advertising provide us huge benefit to easy selection, latest product information and entertain use with extra ordinary idea.
In this ultra-modern era, we always surrounded with advertisement. Group of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
opine that advert
prosperously
lead consumer toward shopping items.
However
, other section of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that advertising always normal, we should not provide much importance to them. While I
personally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
and support to former view.

On the one hand, the reason behind the advertisement completely succeed to lead consumer to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
.
Firstly
, it
Did you mean "provides"?
provide
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
information about new launched
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
to the buyer. We
The word 'familiar' is a noun or an adjective. A verb or adverb is missing or misspelled here, or maybe a comma is missing.
could familiar
with fresh launch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
when we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
promotion on the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
media like television, radio or the internet.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Otherwise
we could not know about millions of new launch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
.
Secondly
, it
Did you mean "becomes"?
become
guide by providing unique specification and detail of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
, which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us in the selection of proper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
as per our requirement.
Finally
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much informative and entertainer. It
Did you mean "has"?
have
enormous new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
,
also
there are impact full social messages which will
greatly
impact on common public.

On the other hand
, There are
also
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "groups"?
group
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that we should not give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to advertisement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, Most advert always repetitive and
continuously
snow bowling on us. This kind of situation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
irritating.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Moreover
it is lead toward over shopping which will generate shopaholic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
Furthermore
, it
Did you mean "disturbs"?
disturb
us in each and every activity, when
Did you mean "we're watching", "we are watching", or "we were watching"?
we watching
television or searching over internet.
For instance
, when
Did you mean "we're watching", "we are watching", or "we were watching"?
we watching
our favorite movie and
Did you mean "going to revel"?
going to reveling
suspense that time break will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
and disturb us, which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
painful and vesting our precious time.

In conclusion
, We are living with promotional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
, promotions might bother us with continuous repeating things and promote us to extra shopping and wastage time, while I
firmly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that if we deal with
judiciously
then advertising provide us huge benefit to easy selection,
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
information and entertain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
with
This word is normally spelled as one.
extra ordinary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.
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IELTS essay Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
316 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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