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Write about the following topic. Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? ONOk
A part of the society is of the view that advertisement encourages us to buy unnecassary things, while the other part holds on the thought that advertisement keeps us informed about new products that could be useful to us. This essay will discuss about both the views and will explain why advertisement are forcing us to buys things with little or no use to us. A group of people have the opinion that commercial ads spread the awareness about the uses of the product that improves our lives. The advertisement gives the overview of how the product can be used in multiple way and how the customers can benefit out of it. For example in a survey conducted in the 2020 by University of Michigan stated that about 80% of the youth population find advertisement benefitting them while making a decision of their buying options. Other part of the section sticks to the opinion that advertisement pushes us to buy items, that after buying does not fulfill the needs. They show content in the short commercial ads which are not fully true and is revealed once we start using the product. For example, a survey conducted in recent times by Mexico university states that 93% of sample population bought items after viewing its multiple uses in an advertisement got annoyed on buying the product as it did not satisfied even the main functionality of the item. I strongly agree that the commercials mislead our judgement and we are lured towards buying an article which not necessarily proves to be useful to us.
A part of the society is of the view that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
encourages us to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
Possible spelling mistake found.
unnecassary
things, while the other part holds on the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
us informed about new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
that could be useful to us. This essay will
Did you mean simply "discuss both"? You do not need the word "about" here.
discuss about both
the views and will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
are forcing us to
Did you mean "buy"?
buys
things with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
or no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
use
to us.

A group of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have the opinion that commercial ads spread the awareness about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uses
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
gives the overview of how the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in multiple way and how the customers can benefit out of it.
For example
in a survey conducted in the 2020 by University of Michigan stated that about 80% of the youth population find
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
Possible spelling mistake found.
benefitting
them while making a decision of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buying
options.

Other part of the section sticks to the opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
pushes us to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
items, that after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buying
does not fulfill the needs. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
content in the short commercial ads which are not
fully
true and
is revealed
once we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
using the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
.
For example
, a survey conducted in recent times by Mexico university states that 93% of sample population
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
items after viewing its multiple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uses
in an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
annoyed on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buying
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
as it did not
After the auxiliary verb 'do', use the base form of a verb. Did you mean "satisfy"?
satisfied
even the main functionality of the item.

I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the commercials mislead our
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
judgement and
we
are lured
towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buying
an article which not
necessarily
proves to be useful to us.
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IELTS essay Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
262 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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