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Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? EmlB
Advertising is a modern art which plays an important role in our day to day life. Sometimes influence of advertisement on people is so negative that they buy things without realizing that they are not useful for them while other things that by the help of advertisement we get to know about material or products which help us to improve our life. I personally believe that due to advertisement our life has improved in many ways. In this essay I will tell few reasons of going with above statement. I agree with those people who says that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Usually people are not aware about the choices they have in our daily life thus they went for the only option they have but with the help of advertisement; manufacture tell customers about the different choices they have. Advertisement is a way of communication between producer and customers. A product cannot tell its own characteristics or advantages hence producer takes media’s help to communicate with human. According to the interview of Mr parakhas, CEO of P&G, he said that we got double profit of sunsilk shampoo after we launched first ever advertise of variants of sunsilk. Other than this, advertisements help us to know about the prices of the product. One can pay higher price of a cheaper product if he she does not know the correct price of the product. Also, with the help of advertisement we get to know the newly launch product which might help us to improve our life style such as instant noodles. However few people believe that advertising encourage us to buy certain things that we really do not need in our life. Sometimes advertise is so attractive that we end up buying that product without realizing that those product is useless for us. Media shows thousands of positive side of that product just to get high turnover with the help of celebrities. Also, producer use celebrities to sell the product for example they make any famous celebrity their brand ambassador and gave chance to consumer to meet your favorite celebrity on buying of that product; just to meet their favorite celebrity they end up buying that product. In conclusion, Advantages of advertisement outweigh the disadvantage and I must say that to promote a product producer must use advertisement also it is useful because we get to know about the choice we have in our daily life.
Advertising is a modern art which plays an
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important
role in our
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day to day
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life
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
influence of
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advertisement
on
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people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
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so
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negative
that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
things without realizing that they are not useful for them while other things that by the
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help
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
about material or
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products
which
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help
us to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. I
personally
believe that due to
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advertisement
our
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life
has
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improved
in
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many
ways. In this essay I will
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tell
few reasons of going with above statement.

I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with those
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people
who
Did you mean "say"? Alternatively, check whether the singular of 'people' should be used.
says
that
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advertisements
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tell
us about new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
that may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
Usually
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people
are not aware about the choices they have in our daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
thus
they went for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
option they have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
with the
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help
of
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advertisement
; manufacture
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tell
customers about the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
choices they have.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Advertisement
is a way of communication between
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producer
and customers. A
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product
cannot
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tell
its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
characteristics or advantages
hence
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producer
takes media’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to communicate with human. According to the interview of Mr
Possible spelling mistake found.
parakhas
, CEO of P&G, he said that we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
double profit of
Possible spelling mistake found.
sunsilk
shampoo after we launched
first
ever advertise of variants of
Possible spelling mistake found.
sunsilk
. Other than this,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
us to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
about the prices of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
. One can pay higher price of a cheaper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
if he she does not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
the correct price of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
.
Also
, with the
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help
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
the
newly
launch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
which might
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
us to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
style such as instant noodles.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that advertising encourage us to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
certain things that we
really
do not need in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
advertise is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
attractive that we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up buying that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
without realizing that those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
is useless for us. Media
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
thousands of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
side of that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
high turnover with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
.
Also
,
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producer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
to sell the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
for example
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
any
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrity
their brand ambassador and gave chance to consumer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
your favorite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrity
on buying of that
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product
;
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
their favorite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrity
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up buying that product.

In conclusion
, Advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
outweigh the disadvantage and I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
say that to promote a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
producer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
also
it is useful
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
about the choice we have in our daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
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IELTS essay Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
411 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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