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Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Since the era of industrialization, advertisement has been a part of the society and same has seeped into the modern era with a modern flavor. Advertisements are an integral part of making a sale for products; whether they are useful or not are solely buyer's opinions. I do agree with the fact that without advertisement, we wouldn't know what is available on the market or if some brands are better than others. But I would emphasize that most modern advertising pushes people towards making unnecessary purchases. To explain my viewpoint, I would share 2 examples. First advertisement strategy is promoting "clearance sales" as "Season's Sale" or "Black Friday" where most of the products are on discounts ranging from 30% to 50%. Since people find such sales lucrative and think they can save a lot more, such sales are heavily advertised from as early as a month before the actual sale dates. These advertisements fill the entire Social media, television and radio spaces with the promotion of forthcoming sales. Products which were never popular during the year have now become "hot-sellers". Another such case is "Online advertisement" which utilises modern software coupled with users browsing history as a means to promote certain products by acting as "click-baits". This method would fill their web browsing with advertisements of the same or related products or with "Frequently brought together" so to speak. Such an approach tempts the users into making purchases they would regret someday. I would conclude by saying that advertisements are a fantastic way to promote goods and provide exposure to products which might be as good as branded ones and need enough recognition. But excessive use of social media and internet platforms have turned advertising as a means to sell scrap under the guise of useful products.
Since the era of industrialization,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
has been a part of the society and same has seeped into the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
era with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
flavor.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Advertisements
are an integral part of making a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sale
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
; whether they are useful or not are
solely
buyer's opinions. I do
Consider using “agree that”.
agree with the fact that
without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
, we wouldn't know what is available on the market or if
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
brands are better than others.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
I would emphasize that most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
advertising pushes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
towards making unnecessary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchases
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
my viewpoint, I would share 2 examples.
First
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
strategy is promoting
Use a smart opening quote here.
"
clearance sales
Use a smart closing quote here.
"
as
Use a smart opening quote here.
"
Season's Sale
Use a smart closing quote here.
"
or
Use a smart opening quote here.
"
Black Friday
Use a smart closing quote here.
"
where most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are on discounts ranging from 30% to 50%. Since
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
find such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
lucrative and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
they can save a lot more, such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
are
heavily
advertised from as early as a month
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
the actual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sale
dates. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
fill the entire Social media, television and radio spaces with the promotion of forthcoming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Products
which were never popular during the year have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
become
Use a smart opening quote here.
"
hot-sellers
Use a smart closing quote here.
"
.

Another such case is
Use a smart opening quote here.
"
Online advertisement
Use a smart closing quote here.
"
which
Possible spelling mistake. ‘utilises’ is British English.
utilises
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
software coupled with users browsing history as a means to promote certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
by acting as
Use a smart opening quote here.
"
click-baits
Use a smart closing quote here.
"
. This method would fill their web browsing with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
of the same or related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
or with
Use a smart opening quote here.
"
Frequently
brought together
Use a smart closing quote here.
"
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
to speak. Such an approach tempts the users into making
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchases
they would regret someday.

I would conclude by saying that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
are a fantastic way to promote
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
and provide exposure to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
which might be as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
as branded ones and need
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
recognition.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
excessive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of social media and internet platforms have turned advertising as a means to sell scrap under the guise of useful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
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IELTS essay Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
297 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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