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Some people say music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Some people say music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. AjBLn
It is often said that, music is the connecting bridge between different society, age groups and even countries too. I do agree with the writer statement and I will eloborate in this essay that how music play a major role. To begin with, music has neutral communication path for all the cultures in the world. if enhace the soal's deepest though and express in melodious voices and songs which accumulate all the people, whether he or she from any region or religion. For example, India has number of states which have their own thinking process, rituals, cultures; however, it collabrate all person's in single bridge. In addition, one music director can unite all types of professionals from various cities of country or nations and compose a fabulous sound which can put us in mood of swing. Furthermore, there is no age limit to listen the music, although different age people enjoy their songs with any age group person. Besides, it is frequently noticed that even if you am from any country, but you like any nation's music or song, and you can enjoy it with any range of age person. For Instance, when we go for visiting any European country where numberous clubs running with enhanced sound system but we do visit that place and participate in dancing with their culture and any age of citizen which rejuvenate our mood and joined all toghether. In conclusion, Music does not have any barrier in terms of culture, country, religious, age. It is the defination of unity. Therefore, I believe that, music is kind of way to attach everyone with their province and customs without any restriction.
It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
said that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is the connecting bridge between
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
society,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
groups and even
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
too. I do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the writer statement and I will
Possible spelling mistake found.
eloborate
in this essay that how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
play a major role.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
has neutral communication path for all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
in the world.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
if
Possible spelling mistake found.
enhace
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
soal
's deepest though and express in melodious voices and songs which accumulate all the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, whether he or she from any region or religion.
For example
, India has number of states which have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
thinking process, rituals,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
;
however
, it
Possible spelling mistake found.
collabrate
all
Incorrect plural form; it does not need any apostrophe. Did you mean "persons"?
person's
in single bridge.
In addition
, one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
director can unite all types of professionals from various cities of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
or nations and compose a fabulous sound which can put us in mood of swing.

Furthermore
, there is no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
limit to listen the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
enjoy their songs with any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
group person.
Besides
, it is
frequently
noticed that even if you
Use second person verb with 'you': "are" or "were".
am
from any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
you like any nation's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
or song, and you can enjoy it with any range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
person.
For Instance
, when we go for visiting any European
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
where
Possible spelling mistake found.
numberous
clubs running with enhanced sound system
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we do visit that place and participate in dancing with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of citizen which rejuvenate our mood and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
joined
all
Possible spelling mistake found.
toghether
.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Music
does not have any barrier in terms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, religious,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
. It is the
Possible spelling mistake found.
defination
of unity.
Therefore
, I believe that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is kind of way to attach everyone with their province and customs without any restriction.
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IELTS essay Some people say music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
275 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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