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some people say it is important to keep your home and workplace tidy, with everything organised and in the correct place. what is your opinion about this?

some people say it is important to keep your home and workplace tidy, with everything organised and in the correct place. what is your opinion about this? NJWW
Nowadays fast-moving life people usually don't get time to look after their things and keep properly at home or the workplace, but I fully agree that we have to keep things tidy, I will explain this in my words in below paragraphs. I personally believed that if we keep home or the workplace tidy that make our mind peaceful which is most important for us and this will make us safe and healthy. as electric lines, book rack, kitchen, dining area, living room, shoe rack, all this must be neet and clean, last time I use to take it easy about tidy my house but as one day we have to keep things in the staircase and my friend come to my house he fast when upstair for somethings and he foldown because many things was on the steps and he got hit by the things and feldown and got injured him self, that insidend make me to keep my house tidy always, i feel very bad also that my friend come to my house and happen this its just because my mistake from that time i would like to keep my home tidy however we all know that workplace is our rice bowl, and we cant afford to make any mistakes, office also tidy and clean that makes our health good because we spend half of our life at the workplace, i have heard from my friend he was working in one of the company he had been good worker at his office but he made one mistakes that he loss one important file, he never organice his office documents properly and that make him loss his job, and work is necessary for us, well getting work is so difficult in this fast life and by small mistakes makes us lose that its painful thinks so its better to keep the work place very tidy. in my point of view i would take tidyness is very important in our life, makes us healthy and good living and that our habits will follow our new generation so makes our society and country and people all are safe and healthy
Nowadays
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-moving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
usually
don't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
time to look after their things and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
keep
properly
at home or the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workplace
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I
fully
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
keep
things
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tidy
, I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
this in my words in below paragraphs. I
personally
believed that if we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
keep
home or the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workplace
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tidy
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
our mind peaceful which is most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for us and this will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
us safe and healthy.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
as
electric lines, book rack, kitchen, dining area, living room, shoe rack, all this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be
Possible spelling mistake found.
neet
and clean, last time I
Make sure that 'use to' is correct. For habitual actions in the past or to mean 'accustomed to', use "used to".
use to
take it easy about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tidy
my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
as one day we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
keep
things in the staircase and my friend
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
he
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
when
Possible spelling mistake found.
upstair
for
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
somethings and
he
Possible spelling mistake found.
foldown
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things was on the
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
steps and
he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
hit by the things and
Possible spelling mistake found.
feldown
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
injured him self, that
Possible spelling mistake found.
insidend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
me to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
keep
my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tidy
always,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
feel
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
also
that my friend
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
and happen this its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mistake
from that time
Did you mean "I"?
i
would like to
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keep
my home
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tidy
however
we all know that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workplace
is our rice bowl, and we
Did you mean "can't" or "cannot"?
cant
afford to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mistakes
, office
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tidy
and clean that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
our health
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
we spend half of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workplace
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
have heard from my friend he was working in one of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
he had been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
worker at his office
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
he made one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mistakes
that he
Did you mean "lost" (past tense of the verb 'lose')?
loss
one
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
file, he never
Possible spelling mistake found.
organice
his office documents
properly
and that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
him loss his job, and work is necessary for us, well getting work is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
difficult in this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mistakes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
us lose that its painful
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thinks
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
its better to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
keep
the work place
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tidy
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
my point of view
Did you mean "I"?
i
would take
Possible spelling mistake found.
tidyness
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
us healthy and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
living and that our habits will follow our new generation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
our society and country and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
all are safe and
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
healthy
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IELTS essay some people say it is important to keep your home and workplace tidy, with everything organised and in the correct place. what is your opinion about this?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
358 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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