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Some people say city life is bad for young people.

Some people say city life is bad for young people. kWnD8
Nowadays young people are faced with a problem where to live better. More and more people understand that life in the stone forest is harmful and nasty. But what is the reason for this? The first and most essential reason related with one of the popular problem nowadays, by far. It is pollution because we can notice that people who live in a big city frequently encounter with rubbish in a street and another part of city, also with stale air. As a result, it affects on people’s health, people have different pathologies and diseases. The following and also important reason is forests and green zone. We live in the internet time, time new technologies. Consequently, we see how fast city is developing, how quick company build new fabric and factories, owing to progress, there are no places left on the forests. To some extant, it related with previous reason and leads to health problems. But also I guess young people want to follow trend such as save our nature or eco-life. And the last reason is entertainment. City has a lot of different entertainment, but this associated with noise and often it distract you from, for instance, work or study. Therefore, so that there is not temptation, people prefer to live in another place such as village. In fact, If you come to think about it, we will realize that it will help both the nature and the economy. To sum up, I consider that everyone should have own reason. But If I decided, I would say that city has a positive sides and a negative sides. And I would not recommend to change city for young people.
Nowadays young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are faced
with a problem where to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
better. More and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
understand that life in the stone forest is harmful and nasty.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
what is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
for this?

The
first
and most essential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
related with one of the popular problem nowadays, by far. It is pollution
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
we can notice that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
city
frequently
encounter with rubbish in a street and another part of city,
also
with stale air.
As a result
, it affects on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
health,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
pathologies and diseases.

The following and
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is forests and green zone. We
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in the internet time, time new technologies.
Consequently
, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
city is developing, how quick
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
build new fabric and factories, owing to progress, there are no places
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
on the forests. To
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extant, it related with previous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
and leads to health problems.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
also
I guess young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
want to follow trend such as save our nature or
Possible spelling mistake found.
eco-life
.

And the last
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is entertainment. City has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
entertainment,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
this associated with noise and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
it
Did you mean "distracts"?
distract
you from,
for instance
, work or study.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that there is not temptation,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in another place such as village. In fact, If you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about it, we will realize that it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
both the nature and the economy.

To sum up, I consider that everyone should have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
If I decided, I would say that city has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
sides and a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
sides. And I would not recommend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
city for young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
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IELTS essay Some people say city life is bad for young people.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
279 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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