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Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change other however, think that change is always a good thing

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change other however, think that change is always a good thing VBKqw
Nowadays, change is must in every aspect of life to become successful. So, a number of people does not need change in their life because they prefer to do the same thing everyday however, others believe that change is necessary to survive a better life. In my point of view, I would say that humans need to accept the change because that will assist them to make some different in thier routine and make their life creative. On the one side of the argument, there are some people who reason that avoid the change is better to live. First and foremost some individuals are afraid of changes because they are not ready to come out from their comfort zone and that make themselves sluggish. For instance, if they try to do something new then they have to push themselves more and that makes their mind to think that it is better to avoid change. Second point in this context is that change require to take the risk that is the reasonpeople are afraid of that. For example, some human beings do the job for their whole life instead of doing business in which they are interested because business required risk. On the other hand, the other group believe that change is must. To elaborate, change helps them to make themselves completely new and enhance their abilities. Furthermore, if they do change in their things then they will understand new things and it assists them to achieve more then they think. Such as, in one of the interview of steave jobs said that in every stage of life he changed himself to get better of him and that helped him to make his business successful. In conclusion, I would say that change remove the tediousness from the people therefore, they need to accept that.
Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
in every aspect of
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life
to become successful.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, a number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
does not need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
in their
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life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they prefer to do the same thing
'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean "every day"?
everyday
however
, others believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
is necessary to survive a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. In my point of view, I would say that humans need to accept the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
that will assist them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
thier
routine and
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make
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
creative.

On the one side of the argument, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who reason that avoid the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
is
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better
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
.
First
and foremost
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals are afraid of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are not ready to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
out from their comfort zone and that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
themselves sluggish.
For instance
, if they try to do something new then they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
push themselves more and that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
their mind to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
to avoid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
. Second point in this context is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
require to take the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
that is
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
reasonpeople
are afraid of that.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
human beings do the job for their whole
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
instead
of doing business in which they
are interested
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
business required
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
.

On the other hand
, the other group believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
. To elaborate,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
themselves completely new and enhance their abilities.
Furthermore
, if they do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
in their things then they will understand new things and it assists them to achieve more
Comparison requires "than", not 'then' nor 'as'.
then
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
. Such as, in one of the interview of
Possible spelling mistake found.
steave
jobs said that in every stage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
himself to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
of him and that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
him to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
his business successful.

In conclusion
, I would say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
remove the tediousness from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
therefore
, they need to accept that.
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IELTS essay Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change other however, think that change is always a good thing

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
303 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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