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Some people prefer small towns other big cities which place would you prefer

Some people prefer small towns other big cities which place would you prefer WE2mq
Nowadays statics shows people who like to live in big cities are increased. There are some reasons for this in my essay I’m going to discuss some of the main reasons and give my opinion. In my point of view one of the main reason why people like to live in big cities are occupation, education, comfort and hope of better future. I myself prefer big cities now when I’m young there can be more benefits like better job opportunities with good salary, since most companies are opening their offices and factories in big cities. Moreover there are lots of health, transportation and entertainment facilities in cities such as hospitals, subway and cinemas. Secondly about small town. There are also some advantages like no pollution, no traffic, not crowded streets. However there are lock of job so people shouldn’t have expectation of higher salary and it can bring lots of economical problems. In conclusion government should improve small town facilities and increase standards of life in small cities that people prefer to stay their own cities.
Nowadays statics
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are increased
. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons for this in my essay I’m going to discuss
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
main reasons and give my opinion. In my point of view one of the main reason why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are occupation, education, comfort and hope of better future. I myself prefer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
when I’m young there can be more benefits like better job opportunities with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
salary, since most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
are opening their offices and factories in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Moreover
there are lots of health, transportation and entertainment facilities in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
such as hospitals, subway and cinemas.
Secondly
about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
town. There are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advantages like no pollution, no traffic, not crowded streets.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
there are lock of job
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
shouldn’t have expectation of higher salary and it can bring lots of
Did you mean "economic" (=connected with economy)?
economical
problems.
In conclusion
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
town facilities and increase standards of life in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to stay their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
.
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IELTS essay Some people prefer small towns other big cities which place would you prefer

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
176 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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