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Many nations have simple goals to provide world best facilities for their citizens. It is possible by economic development of whichever country in different sectors like education, infrastructure, medical and business. These sectors have very huge impact on economy which is directly related to people living patterns. The economical growth have various plus points such as literacy rate and individual life span will increase. However, it also brings some drawback to the social values in family relationship as a result.

Many nations have simple goals to provide world best facilities for their citizens. It is possible by economic development of whichever country in different sectors like education, infrastructure, medical and business. These sectors have very huge impact on economy which is directly related to people living patterns. The economical growth have various plus points such as literacy rate and individual life span will increase. However, it also brings some drawback to the social values in family relationship as a result. j9ebX
Many nations have simple goals to provide world best facilities for their citizens. It is possible by economic development of whichever country in different sectors like education, infrastructure, medical and business. These sectors have very huge impact on economy which is directly related to people living patterns. The economical growth have various plus points such as literacy rate and individual life span will increase. However, it also brings some drawback to the social values in family relationship as a result. The economical changes generate opportunity for society. Several education reforms assist general public to live desire professional lifes. Furthermore, as they have satisfied paid job that means they are investing more money behind their basic needs like entertainment, housing and foods so on. Similarly, the development in medical sectors has own merits too. The medical advancement improves the human kind life expectancy from the extreme deadly diseases. For example, the study conducted by WHO on 195 countries in world showed that nation who had better medical technology and literate community lived longer life than the other nations who had but not to much. Conversely, a number of multitude supports the belief that important social values are losing as a consequence. The layman who involves in 12 hours employment from Monday to Saturday; they have less time to spend with their family and especially children. It causes children to be anti social, and they might be contributing in criminal situation, if they are not properly in touch with parents. To illustrate, African American origin community child often suspects in a good deal of crime in North America because of lack of social interaction with family. To sum up, economical gain has not only advantages but also has bad side too.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
nations have simple goals to provide world best facilities for their citizens. It is possible by economic development of whichever country in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
sectors like education, infrastructure,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
and business. These sectors have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
huge impact on economy which is
directly
related to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
living patterns. The
Did you mean "economic" (=connected with economy)?
economical
growth have various plus points such as literacy rate and individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
span will increase.
However
, it
also
brings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawback to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
values in family relationship
as a result
.

The
Did you mean "economic" (=connected with economy)?
economical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
generate opportunity for society. Several education reforms assist
Consider using "public".
general public
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
desire professional
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "lives", the plural form of the noun 'life'?
lifes
.
Furthermore
, as they have satisfied paid job that means they are investing more money behind their basic needs like entertainment, housing and foods
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
Similarly
, the development in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
sectors has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
merits too. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
advancement
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
the human kind
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
expectancy from the extreme deadly diseases.
For example
, the study conducted by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
WHO
on 195 countries in world
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that nation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
had better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
technology and literate community
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
longer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
than the other nations
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
had
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not
Did you mean "too"?
to
much.

Conversely
, a number of multitude supports the belief that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
values are losing as a consequence. The layman
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
involves in 12 hours employment from Monday to Saturday; they have less time to spend with their family and
especially
children. It causes children to be anti
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
, and they might be contributing in criminal situation, if they are not
properly
in touch with parents. To illustrate, African American origin community child
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
suspects in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
deal of crime in North America
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
interaction with family.

To sum up, economical gain has not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
advantages
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
side too.
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IELTS essay Many nations have simple goals to provide world best facilities for their citizens. It is possible by economic development of whichever country in different sectors like education, infrastructure, medical and business. These sectors have very huge impact on economy which is directly related to people living patterns. The economical growth have various plus points such as literacy rate and individual life span will increase. However, it also brings some drawback to the social values in family relationship as a result.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
289 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Many nations have simple goals to provide world best facilities for their citizens. It is possible by economic development of whichever country in different sectors like education, infrastructure, medical and business. These sectors have very huge impact on economy which is directly related to people living patterns. The economical growth have various plus points such as literacy rate and individual life span will increase. However, it also brings some drawback to the social values in family relationship as a result.