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Some people play sports when they are young but then stop doing physical exercise when they become adults. Why is this? What can be done to solve this problem?

Some people play sports when they are young but then stop doing physical exercise when they become adults. Why is this? What can be done to solve this problem? 3aMlJ
Most of the people start their families after the age of thirty these days whereas in the past they used to plan at a young age. In my opinion, this is a positive development considering financial stability and maturity in people after their thirties. One of the reasons why people decide to marry and have babies later in their life is because they want stablity economically. Generally, people complete their studies and start their career by thirties, as a result, they get settled with a good house, car and sufficient bank balance which helps them in providing better future and secure environment to their family. To illustrate, my classmates and I who all are born in the 90s got settled financially at the age of 28 or 29 and almost 70% of them got married after that due to having secure jobs. Similarly, the other reason is people get mature as they grow older and can make wise decisions in comparison to their younger days. They gain better understanding and maturity over time from different situations and experiences and this helps them in choosing a perfect life partner, providing better values and education to their children. For instance, there was a school in china that observed that children from little older parents are most likely to be sincere, sensible and obedient compared to the kids with younger parents. In conclusion, people thinking practically before starting a new family in terms of getting settled financially and mature enough is a sign of positive and better development. If all the people thought like this, there would have not been issues like overpopulation and child labouring.
Most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
their families after the age of thirty these days whereas in the past they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to plan at a young age. In my opinion, this is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
development considering financial stability and maturity in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
after their thirties.

One of the reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
decide to marry and have babies later in their life is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they want
Possible spelling mistake found.
stablity
economically
.
Generally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
complete their studies and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
their career by thirties,
as a result
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
settled with a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
, car and sufficient bank balance which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them in providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
future and secure environment to their family. To illustrate, my classmates and I who all
are born
in the 90s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
settled
financially
at the age of 28 or 29 and almost 70% of them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
married after that due to having secure jobs.

Similarly
, the other reason is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
mature as they grow older and can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
wise decisions
in comparison
to their younger days. They gain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
understanding and maturity over time from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
situations and experiences and this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them in choosing a perfect life partner, providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
values and education to their children.
For instance
, there was a school in
Capitalize this word if you mean the country, not white porcelain.
china
that observed that children from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
older parents are most likely to be sincere, sensible and obedient compared to the kids with younger parents.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
thinking
practically
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
starting a new family in terms of getting settled
financially
and mature
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
development. If all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
like this, there would have not been issues like overpopulation and child
Possible spelling mistake. 'labouring' is British English.
labouring
.
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IELTS essay Some people play sports when they are young but then stop doing physical exercise when they become adults. Why is this? What can be done to solve this problem?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
273 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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