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Some people like to live in one place most of their life. Other people prefer to live in many different cities. Which do you prefer and why? Use specific reasons and examples to support your response. v.1

Some people like to live in one place most of their life. Other people prefer to live in many different cities. Which do you prefer and why? Use specific reasons and examples to support your response. v. 1
For the past few decades, it is very common among the people all around the world to travel and explore new places. Due to travelling internationally they need to take the flight and because of a spike in the number of people travelling, the airfares have gone down. This essay shall look into both the advantages and disadvantages of increasing tourism activities. One the one hand, lesser the ticket cost, more the people will be encouraged to move as it will be a financially less burden on them. The second advantage is linked to the first one as the more they travel, the more they will know about the culture and tradition of people from different part of the world which will expand their horizon. For instance, if the person from a western background travels to Asian countries, he will know more about their eating habits, languages they speak, the culture they follow etc. , and this will help them to be more open and accepting. On the other hand, there are two main disadvantages that I can see because of increasing journey. Firstly, because of more travelling, the number of flights will grow as more of it will be needed to carry passengers and this will cause more air pollution. The harmful gas release from the aviation fuel will affect global warming. In addition, more they travel, more the chances are of spreading any kind of epidermic. The recent example of it is the outbreak of coronavirus which started from China and within few days spread all over the world. To conclude, as travelling helps people to know about different countries, it also has a harmful effect on the environment and could be the reason for the spread of the epidemic.
For the past few decades, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
common among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
all around the world to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
and explore new places. Due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
internationally
they need to take the flight and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of a spike in the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
, the airfares have gone down. This essay shall look into both the advantages and disadvantages of increasing tourism activities.

Did you mean "on"?
One
the one hand, lesser the ticket cost, more the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
be encouraged
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
as it will be a
financially
less burden on them. The second advantage
is linked
to the
first
one as the more they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
, the more they will know about the culture and tradition of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
part of the world which will expand their horizon.
For instance
, if the person from a western background
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travels
to Asian countries, he will know more about their eating habits, languages they speak, the culture they follow etc.
Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
,
and this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to be more open and accepting.

On the other hand
, there are two main disadvantages that I can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of increasing journey.
Firstly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
, the number of flights will grow as more of it will
be needed
to carry passengers and this will cause more air pollution. The harmful gas release from the aviation fuel will affect global warming.
In addition
, more they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
, more the chances are of spreading any kind of epidermic. The recent example of it is the outbreak of coronavirus which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
from China and within few days spread all over the world.

To conclude
, as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to know about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries, it
also
has a harmful effect on the environment and could be the reason for the spread of the epidemic.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people like to live in one place most of their life. Other people prefer to live in many different cities. Which do you prefer and why? Use specific reasons and examples to support your response. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
292 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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