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Some people have the same type of job throughout their life while others prefer to change the type of job. What’s your opinion v.1

Some people have the same type of job throughout their life while others prefer to change the type of job. What’s your opinion v. 1
Nowadays, there are some people who adopt similar work for whole life. However, I highly agree with the idea that people prefer to change among many kinds of job after some duration. The first benefit of changing the type of job is helping people earn more money. When people start new jobs, they are pushed out of their comfort zone and are forced to accustom themselves to new systems, new routines and new skills that can only be learnt from a new work situation, thus they are able to develop valuable professional skills and gain considerable experiences, which helps them be more likely to offer a higher pay package. In fact, according to Forbes, workers who stay with a company for longer than two years are said to earn 50% less than their hoping equivalents. The other advantage of changing the type of job is assisting people in having great opportunities to build new relationships. Moving from one company to another ones means that people have to make acquaintance of new colleagues who will teach them new things and work with them in the company, which will help you quickly get used to the new environment and overcome all difficulties at work. In conclusion, although changing the type of work after duration brings many substantial benefits, it still has some slight disadvantages. Consequently, in order to remove these disadvantages, you should consider carefully before making a decision about whether changing sort of job or not
Nowadays, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who adopt similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
for whole life.
However
, I
highly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
among
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
kinds of
Did you mean "jobs"?
job
after
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
duration.

The
first
benefit of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changing
the type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is helping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
earn more money. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
, they
are pushed
out of their comfort zone and
are forced
to accustom themselves to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
systems,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
routines and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
that can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be
Possible spelling mistake. 'learnt' is British English.
learnt
from a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
situation,
thus
they are able to develop valuable professional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and gain considerable experiences, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them be more likely to offer a higher pay package. In fact, according to Forbes, workers who stay with a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
for longer than two years
are said
to earn 50% less than their hoping equivalents.

The other advantage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changing
the type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is assisting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in having great opportunities to build
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
relationships. Moving from one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
to another ones means that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
acquaintance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
colleagues who will teach them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
things and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
with them in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
, which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you
quickly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
environment and overcome all difficulties at work.

In conclusion
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changing
the type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
after duration brings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
substantial benefits, it
still
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
slight disadvantages.
Consequently
, in order to remove these disadvantages, you should consider
carefully
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
making a decision about whether
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changing
sort of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
or not
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
28Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people have the same type of job throughout their life while others prefer to change the type of job. What’s your opinion v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
244 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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