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Some people feel unsafe when they are in public and at home. What are the possible causes of this and what are some possible solutions? v.4

Some people feel unsafe when they are in public and at home. What are the possible causes of this and what are some possible solutions? v. 4
Certain individuals have an opnion that they are prone to danger such as robbery and kidnapping not only at their house but also outside. This essay will discuss the causes associated with unsfe environment and suggest the viable solutions. The causes for the increase in criminal activities such as murder, kidnapping and robbery is firstly mot of people are below the poverty line that is they dont have enough money to fulfil their basic need such as food, clothing and shelther. Thus they indulge into wrongful activities to earn enough money for meeting their needs. Secondly, criminal activities are increasing because of lack of basic education. Individuals do not posses the required skills and knowledge for working in a company of starting their own business, as a result they opt for althernae methods for earning money such as killing someone for cash and so on. All these causes has made the society always worried about their security and safety. To elucidate, according to the recent study India is ranked in 10th position for the most unsafe place to live because of criminal activities. The solutions to these causes os that governemt of nation should provide free school education to all people so that they posses the basic knowledge and experience which will aid them in starting their own small scale business or to work in any company and thus earn money for their requirement. Furthermore, their should not be any income disparity. Salary and basic remuneration must be equally distributed among all the people irrespective of their education degree. This will help reduce poverty among people. All the aforementioned solutions will help to reduce the crime rate in the country and thus peace and harmony will prevail. To exemplify, many non-profit organisations are working towards providing education to children and adoloscents in order to increase the literacy rate. To conclude, the main causes of increase in crime is poor and illetrate people and this can be solved by providin them with good job opportunities and basic school education. It is recommended that governemnt should motivate people to study and enhance their knowledhge as this will aid in decreasing the crime rate in country.
Certain individuals have an
Possible spelling mistake found.
opnion
that they are prone to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
such as robbery and kidnapping not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
at their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
outside. This essay will discuss the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
causes
associated with
Possible spelling mistake found.
unsfe
environment and suggest the viable solutions.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
causes
for the increase in criminal activities such as murder, kidnapping and robbery is
firstly
mot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are below the poverty line
that is
they
Possible spelling mistake found
dont
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to fulfil their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
basic
need such as food, clothing and
Possible spelling mistake found.
shelther
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
they indulge into wrongful activities to earn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for meeting their needs.
Secondly
, criminal activities are increasing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
basic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. Individuals do not posses the required
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and knowledge for working in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
of starting their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
business,
as a result
they opt for
Possible spelling mistake found.
althernae
methods for earning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
such as killing someone for cash and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. All these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
causes
has made the society always worried about their security and safety. To elucidate, according to the recent study India
is ranked
in 10th position for the most unsafe place to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of criminal activities.

The solutions to these
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "causes'" or "cause's"?
causes
Possible spelling mistake found.
os
that
Possible spelling mistake found.
governemt
of nation should provide free school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
to all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
Do not use a noun immediately after the pronoun 'they'. Use a verb or an adverb, or possibly some other part of speech.
they posses
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
basic
knowledge and experience which will aid them in starting their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
scale business or to work in any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
and
thus
earn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for their requirement.
Furthermore
, their should not be any income disparity. Salary and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
basic
remuneration
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be
equally
distributed among all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
irrespective of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
degree. This will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
poverty among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. All the aforementioned solutions will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the crime rate in the country and
thus
peace and harmony will prevail. To exemplify,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
non-profit
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
are working towards providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
to children and
Possible spelling mistake found.
adoloscents
in order to increase the literacy rate.

To conclude
, the main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
causes
of increase in crime is poor and
Possible spelling mistake found.
illetrate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and this can
be solved
by
Possible spelling mistake found.
providin
them with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
job opportunities and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
basic
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. It
is recommended
that
Possible spelling mistake found.
governemnt
should motivate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to study and enhance their
Possible spelling mistake found.
knowledhge
as this will aid in decreasing the crime rate in country.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
25Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Mistakes
You live a new life for every new language you speak. If you know only one language, you live only once.
Czech Proverb

IELTS essay Some people feel unsafe when they are in public and at home. What are the possible causes of this and what are some possible solutions? v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
363 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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