Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people feel that paparazzi invade the privacy of the celebrities

Some people feel that paparazzi invade the privacy of the celebrities 12jN
Some people feel that paparazzi invade the privacy of the celebrities way too much which hinders their private life, while others believe this is a price that is to be paid for being famous. In my opinion, although being a celebrity comes with the condition of having most of their private life on public display, there should be times when their privacy must be respected. Celebrities are the people who are celebrated for their achievements by everyone around the world. People are extremely fascinated by their lives and want to monitor their every move. They are the center of attention everywhere they go. In Fact it is one of the main reasons why a person aspires to be famous. Paparazzi have an important role to play in making a person famous. It constantly follows the celebrities, tracks their every move, keeps an eye on their every action and then reports it to the world. And this is what gives a person the celebrity status. The life of a celebrity mostly depends upon their popularity amongst their audience and media just helps them do it. However, there are times when the media is harsh and extremely insensitive towards their privacy. The lives of celebrities are extremely vulnerable because they are judged for their every move. They deserve a life apart from the media where they don't have to constantly worry about their actions and are allowed to live a normal life. At the end of the day there is a normal person hidden inside every celebrity and they deserve a certain amount of privacy and have a life which is not subjected to constant judgement. Ultimately every person needs a break from their daily routine and spend some quality time with their family and themselves and celebrities are no different.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
feel that paparazzi invade the privacy of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
way too much which hinders their private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, while others believe this is a price
that is
to
be paid
for being
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
. In my opinion, although being a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrity
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
with the condition of having most of their private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
on public display, there should be times when their privacy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be respected
.

Celebrities are the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
are celebrated
for their achievements by everyone around the world.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
are
extremely
fascinated by their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
and want to monitor their every
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
. They are the center of attention everywhere they go. In
The comma is probably missing here: "Fact, it".
Fact it
is one of the main reasons why a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
aspires to be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
. Paparazzi have an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role to play in making a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
. It
constantly
follows the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tracks
their every
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
an eye on their every action and then reports it to the world. And this is what gives a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrity
status. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrity
mostly
depends upon their popularity amongst their audience and media
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them do it.

However
, there are times when the media
You should probably use: "are".
is
harsh and
extremely
insensitive towards their privacy. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
are
extremely
vulnerable
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
are judged
for their every
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
. They deserve a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
apart from the media where they don't
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
constantly
worry about their actions and are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a normal life.

At the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the day there is a normal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
hidden inside every
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
celebrity and
they deserve a certain amount of privacy and have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
which is not subjected to constant judgement.
Ultimately
every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
needs a break from their daily routine and spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
quality time with their family and themselves and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
are no
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Some people feel that paparazzi invade the privacy of the celebrities

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
299 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts