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Some people feel old building are better for living. Others say modern construction offer more benefits. Discuss both view and give your option?

Some people feel old building are better for living. Others say modern construction offer more benefits. VQBlQ
In this contemporary era, people often confuse about choosing category of architecture. A number of people believe that there is no other place to living instead of ancient building. While, opponents claim that newly infrastructure of building gives more advantages. This essay will discuss both sides with my supportive view that people are investing money on reconstruction of old apartment that they should be utilises new building. Admittedly, old building has immense merits. Based of ancient building are stronger rather than new one and also deeper so that chance of falling in pieces are reduce. For instance, Indian heritage building like taj mahal, red fort, statue of unity are long lasting infrastructure only because of primary sources and well built pillar. Additionally, properties of old building are unique according to seasons which makes apartment automatically cooler in summer time as well as warmer in winter. To exemplify, old infrastructure not only has cement, bricks but also has soil and mud of animals which makes building cool and hot. On the other hand, no one can deny that new building has benefited to us. In the past when natural disaster occurred like heavy flood, acid rain at that time many building are destroyed. Nevertheless, today’s invention of chemical and paints helps engineering to construct water proof building which resistant of toxic gases. Furthermore, due to mixing of soil worms harm old building but nowadays the most of apartments constructed by RCC. Consequently, building become worms free. However, these chemicals can not save people by cold and hot weather which ruined properties of compounds. To conclude, In my view, standard of living become change due to modern architecture work but we can not forget devastating effects. Although, old building has plethora of positive sides.
In this contemporary era,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
confuse about choosing category of architecture. A number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that there is no other place to living
instead
of ancient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
, opponents claim that
newly
infrastructure of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
gives more advantages. This essay will discuss both sides with my supportive view that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are investing money on reconstruction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
apartment that they should be
Consider using the past participle "utilised"?
utilises
new building.

Admittedly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
has immense merits. Based of ancient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
are stronger
rather
than new one and
also
deeper
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that chance of falling in pieces are
Consider using a past participle here: "reduced".
reduce
.
For instance
, Indian heritage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
like
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
taj mahal
, red fort, statue of unity are
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
long lasting
infrastructure
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of primary sources and
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well built
pillar.
Additionally
, properties of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
are unique according to seasons which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
apartment
automatically
cooler in
Consider using "summer".
summer time
as well
as warmer in winter. To exemplify,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
infrastructure not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
has cement, bricks
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
has soil and mud of animals which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
cool and hot.

On the other hand
, no one can deny that new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
has benefited to us. In the past when natural disaster occurred like heavy flood, acid rain at that time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
.
Nevertheless
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s invention of chemical and paints
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
engineering to construct
This word is normally spelled as one.
water proof
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
which resistant of toxic gases.
Furthermore
, due to mixing of soil worms harm
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
nowadays the
After 'most of', you should use 'the' ("most of the apartments") or simply say "most apartments".
most of apartments
constructed by RCC.
Consequently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
become worms free.
However
, these chemicals can not save
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
and hot weather which ruined properties of compounds.

To conclude
, In my view, standard of living become
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
due to modern architecture work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we can not forget devastating effects.
“Although” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Although
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
has plethora of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
sides.
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IELTS essay Some people feel old building are better for living. Others say modern construction offer more benefits.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
292 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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