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Some people feel governments rather than private companies should be in charge of medical services

Some people feel governments rather than private companies should be in charge of medical services 0plO1
It is argued that the state organisations rather thqn private companies are expected to be responsible for medical services. Personally I completely agree with this idea as governments have more resources than private organizations. First of all, as local governments regularly make a lot of money in healthy areas, many medical pills and tablets can be produced and exported. In addition, many kinds of medical experiments can be done in order to discover brand new methods of modern curing every year. Consequently, the higher types of medical services are offered to public, the less citizens catchillnesses. Second of all, consumers pay taxes including income, property and value added taxes and this should be provided by the state as a kind of high levelled medical assists and drugs. Due to the fact that taxes are considered as the most useful income of the economy of the country. Moreover, the department of medication and health is able to manage their employees' salaries through the funding of taxes. Turnin to private organizations, their funding is limited and therenis no income for them from medical and health organizations. In conclusion, even though people can cary whether the government should be responsible for the medical supplies or not, I agree all medical will be better and more useful only if the medicine is funded and run by government.
It
is argued
that the state
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
rather
Possible spelling mistake found.
thqn
private
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to be responsible for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
services.
Personally
I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
have more resources than private
Do not mix variants of the same word ('organization' and 'organisation') within a single text.
organizations
.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, as local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
regularly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
money in healthy areas,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
pills and tablets can
be produced
and exported.
In addition
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
experiments can
be done
in order to discover
'brand new' seems to be a compound adjective in front of a noun. Use a hyphen: "brand-new".
brand new
methods of modern curing every year.
Consequently
, the higher types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
services
are offered
to public, the
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun citizens is countable.
less
citizens
Possible spelling mistake found.
catchillnesses
. Second of all, consumers pay
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
including income, property and value
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
and this should
be provided
by the state as a kind of high levelled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
assists and drugs. Due to the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
are considered
as the most useful income of the economy of the country.
Moreover
, the department of medication and health is able to manage their employees' salaries through the funding of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Turnin
to private
Do not mix variants of the same word ('organization' and 'organisation') within a single text.
organizations
, their funding
is limited
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
therenis
no income for them from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
and health
Do not mix variants of the same word ('organization' and 'organisation') within a single text.
organizations
.
In conclusion
,
even though
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
Possible spelling mistake found.
cary
whether the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should be responsible for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
supplies or not, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
will be better and more useful
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
if the medicine
is funded
and run by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
.
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IELTS essay Some people feel governments rather than private companies should be in charge of medical services

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
223 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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