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Some people claim that the government should provide free health care. Others think that the government will not provide the most innovative methods of treatment and it’s better to invest those funds in education and culture. What is your opinion?

Some people claim that the government should provide free health care. Others think that the government will not provide the most innovative methods of treatment and it’s better to invest those funds in education and culture. What is your opinion? BEaa
There is currently a contentious argument over whether health care is free. Some people argue that health care should be given free to all the citizens. Others think that instead of spending money on innovation treatment methods government should spend on education and culture. I partially agree with this opinion. To begin with, Health is paramount in many people lives. Many people feel that government should provide free health care to all. As an effect, it increases burden on government and tax payers. For instance, the national health service in the UK provides free healthcare to all the residents. Not everybody can go to a private hospital, only the wealthy people can afford it. Consequently, individuals should concentrate on their lifestyle such as eating healthy and fresh vegetables, doing exercises 3 times a week and avoid eating outside. On the other hand, some people argue that instead of spending money on health, government should spend on education and culture. Health is a individual responsibility people need to take care of themselves yet some early cancer detection tests must be free for everyone. As a result of some hazardous diseases can be detected in early stage. There is a need to improve education, building new schools and protecting our culture. However, health has some serious consequences such as death, long term illiness. In my opinion, Health care should be given free to all the citizens because health is more important than money. There are many low-income people who can’t afford private health care. Government should look after them.
There is
currently
a contentious argument over whether
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
to all the citizens. Others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
instead
of spending money on innovation treatment methods
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should spend on education and culture. I
partially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this opinion.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Health
is paramount in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
lives
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
feel that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
to all. As an effect, it increases burden on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
and tax payers.
For instance
, the national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
service in the UK provides
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
healthcare to all the residents. Not everybody can go to a private hospital,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can afford it.
Consequently
, individuals should concentrate on their lifestyle such as eating healthy and fresh vegetables, doing exercises 3 times a week and avoid eating outside.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue that
instead
of spending money on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should spend on education and culture.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Health
is
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
individual responsibility
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
need to take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
of themselves
yet
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
early cancer detection
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tests
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
for everyone.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
a result of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
hazardous diseases can
be detected
in early stage. There is a need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
education, building new schools and protecting our culture.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
serious consequences such as death, long term
Possible spelling mistake found.
illiness
.

In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
to all the citizens
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than money. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
low-income
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who can’t afford private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
should look after them.
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IELTS essay Some people claim that the government should provide free health care. Others think that the government will not provide the most innovative methods of treatment and it’s better to invest those funds in education and culture. What is your opinion?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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