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Some people choose to work at one job for a long time. Others prefer to change jobs frequently. Which way do you think is better? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your choice.

Some people choose to work at one job for a long time. Others prefer to change jobs frequently. Which way do you think is better? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your choice. 1kQBN
Many people believe that working at one job for a long time is better than changing jobs frequently. In my opinion, I disagree with their point, because I think it will be better to change jobs frequently. There are several reasons to support my opinion. Firstly, when people change their jobs frequently, they will gain a huge of experience in many areas. People who just choose to work one job for a long time will have experiences and knowledge about only their field. In contrast, a changing job person will have opportunities to learn many things in many their jobs. For example, I used to work a lot of jobs such as waitress, clerk, secretary and so on, so I have numerous experiences which can help me deal with problems. Secondly, changing a job means people also change their environment, including offices, cities, and countries. The reality, if an employee moves their job to another job, they will change their house to commute easer from their home to the new office. Therefore, they can make a lot of new neighborhoods, colleagues and have the opportunity to discover other cultures, lifestyles. In addition, many people cannot orient their career for the first job, so they need to change jobs frequently to explore occupations in which they interest. For instance, after graduating from a university, my sister worked in a marketing department for 2 years, however, she often felt tired and bored with her job. Fortunately, after changing 4 jobs now she is an owner of a clothes store and she extremely loves this job. To sum up, Although there are many points about people could change jobs frequently or work one job for a long time, I believe that it is better to change jobs frequently. Because people can learn many experiences, discover the new environment and find the suitable job.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that working at one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
for a long time is better than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
frequently
. In my opinion, I disagree with their point,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it will be better to
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change
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
frequently
. There are several reasons to support my opinion.
Firstly
, when
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people
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change
their
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jobs
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frequently
, they will gain
The phrase 'a huge of' is not correct. Use a noun, not an adjective, between 'a' and 'of'.
a huge of
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experience
in
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many
areas.
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People
who
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just
choose to work one
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job
for a long time will have
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experiences
and knowledge about
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
their field.
In contrast
, a
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changing
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job
person will have opportunities to learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
their
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jobs
.
For example
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to work
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a lot of
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jobs
such as waitress, clerk, secretary and
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so
on,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I have numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
me deal with problems.
Secondly
,
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changing
a
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job
means
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people
also
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change
their environment, including offices, cities, and countries. The reality, if an employee
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moves
their
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job
to another
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job
, they will
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change
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
to commute
Possible spelling mistake found.
easer
from their home to the new office.
Therefore
, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
new neighborhoods, colleagues and have the opportunity to discover other cultures, lifestyles.
In addition
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
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people
cannot orient their career for the
first
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job
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they need to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
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frequently
to explore occupations in which they interest.
For instance
, after graduating from a university, my sister worked in a marketing department for 2 years,
however
, she
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
felt tired and bored with her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
Fortunately
, after
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changing
4
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
she is an owner of a clothes
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
store and
she
extremely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loves
this
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job
. To sum up, Although there are
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many
points about
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people
could
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change
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
frequently
or work one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
for a long time, I believe that it is better to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
frequently
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
, discover the new environment and find the suitable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
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IELTS essay Some people choose to work at one job for a long time. Others prefer to change jobs frequently. Which way do you think is better? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your choice.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
310 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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