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Some people believe there should be a tax on junk food

Some people believe there should be a tax on junk food lRpkb
Junk food cause many disease namely bad cholesterol, obesity. It is believe by some people that, large amount of tax ough to apply on junk food to stop consume it to much. This essay will discusses both side of arguments and discuss why tax should be apply on junk food. Out of all arguments, the strongest one to prove my view is that junk food take less time and effort to prepare. Firstly, it is observed in many cities, millions of people spend more then 8 hours in their work or study. In other words, they have not enough time to make fully nutritions food. For example, this can be seen by the growing number of working people in western countries, who regularly consumed junk food for convience rather than other food. Despite all advantages, which junk food brought with us, it has some negative points. To begin with, junk food contains low amount of vitamins as well as carbs. In addition, most of the junk food fried in oil. When it fried, chemical reaction is occured and it cause several serious health issues. If junk food had not become so popular, obesity would not have happend so rapidly. Secondly, government shoud spend money on seminars to educate people about regular exercise and healthy diet. perhaps they shoud also impose tax on it. To conclude, this essay acknowledges that fast food take less time to prepare although it has some several heath issues. In my opinion government and big organisation should be tax on junk food.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
cause
Possible agreement error. The noun disease seems to be countable; consider using: "many diseases".
many disease
namely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
cholesterol, obesity. It is
Consider using a past participle here: "believed".
believe
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that, large amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
Possible spelling mistake found.
ough
to apply on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
consume it
Did you mean "too"?
to
much. This essay will
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "discuss"
discusses
both side of arguments and discuss why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
should be
Consider using the past participle "applied"?
apply
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
food.

Out of all arguments, the strongest one to prove my view is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
take less time and effort to prepare.
Firstly
, it
is observed
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cities, millions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
spend more
Comparison requires "than", not 'then' nor 'as'.
then
8 hours in their work or study.
In other words
, they have not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
fully
Possible spelling mistake found.
nutritions
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
For example
, this can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
by the growing number of working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in western countries, who
regularly
consumed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
for
Possible spelling mistake found.
convience
rather
than other food.

Despite all advantages, which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
brought with us, it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
points. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
contains low amount of vitamins
as well
as carbs.
In addition
, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
fried in oil. When it fried, chemical reaction is
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "occurred", the past tense form of the verb 'occur'?
occured
and it
Did you mean "causes"?
cause
several serious health issues. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
had not become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
popular, obesity would not have
Possible spelling mistake found.
happend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
rapidly
.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
Possible spelling mistake found.
shoud
spend money on seminars to educate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
about regular exercise and healthy diet.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
perhaps
they
Possible spelling mistake found.
shoud
also
impose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
on it.

To conclude
, this essay acknowledges that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
take less time to prepare although it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
several heath issues. In my opinion
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
should be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
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IELTS essay Some people believe there should be a tax on junk food

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
256 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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