Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people believe that university and collage is get a better to get a successful career. It is better to get a job after school.discuss boht these views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that university and collage is get a better to get a successful career. It is better to get a job after school. discuss boht these views and give your opinion. yDLaP
Study is a source of wealth and awareness. It is often argued by some that study at university and collage is best route to successful career. Meanwhile, others argue that it is better to get a job after school. This essay will explore that the both sides arguement, before reaching a logical opinion. On the one hand, the supporters of the view that the study at university and collage is best route to successful career. As at the university level student are mature and face the challenge of the future. They tackle the problems of the society. Take an example of the European Union, The government of the Europe gives the scholarship of their students. Thus the university student are more successful in career. On the other hand, the advocates idea that student get a job after school education. They do not know the face challenges of the society. As the student are immature at school level. They have less temperament to solve the problems. For instance, in the Japan, in 2019, A survey held the children do not work at school level. Hence, the student immature at school level. However, i believe that after university is better to get a job. The student learn many thing in university life. They learn to manage a job work. As they learn to behave their boss. To sum-up, the university students get a job for successful career. The others believe that it is better to get a job after school for successful career
Study is a source of wealth and awareness. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argued by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that study at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
and collage
A determiner is probably missing here: "is the best".
is best
route to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
. Meanwhile, others argue that it is better to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. This essay will explore that the both sides
Possible spelling mistake found.
arguement
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
reaching a logical opinion.

On the one hand, the supporters of the view that the study at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
and collage
A determiner is probably missing here: "is the best".
is best
route to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
. As at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
level
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
are mature and face the challenge of the future. They tackle the problems of the society. Take an example of the European Union, The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
of the Europe gives the scholarship of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
are more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
in career.

On the other hand
, the
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "advocates'" or "advocate's"?
advocates
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
education. They do not know the face challenges of the society.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
are immature at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
level. They have less temperament to solve the problems.
For instance
, in the Japan, in 2019, A survey held the children do not work at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
level.
Hence
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
immature at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
level.

However
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
believe that after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
is better to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: "learns".
learn
Possible agreement error. The noun thing seems to be countable; consider using: "many things".
many thing
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
life. They learn to manage a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
work.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
they learn to behave their boss.

To sum-up, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
. The others believe that it is better to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
career
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Some people believe that university and collage is get a better to get a successful career. It is better to get a job after school. discuss boht these views and give your opinion.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
250 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts