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In VietNam, there are many opinions about whether sex before marriage would be beneficial or not. disscuss the topic and state your opinion.

In VietNam, there are many opinions about whether sex before marriage would be beneficial or not. disscuss the topic and state your opinion. 0laAG
In Viet Nam, sex before marriage is believed by some people to be beneficial for young people. Although old generation in our country think it is not necessary because of traditional point of view. From my perspective, I think people who sex before marriage can maintain the relationship and make great experiences for lovelife. Only thing, you should have safe sex. The main concern about sex before marriage is the fact that love is not only based on attraction and romance. According to a research of scientish in America, if mentally and spiritually you are close, wedding is in your souls and don't need official one to make the union unique. Sex is also important and above all, a good fusion when it comes to physical really proves that's the love is deep. We can therefore see sex before marriage can be very beneficial to maintaining the flame if love. Furthermore, I strongly believe people with their sex experiences can can make your lovelife more better than anothers by the way they explore it before marriage in safe measure. For example, marriage is big responsibility at the age 18 -25 people is struggling with life and trying to settle down with job and making home. In addition, you have wasted your golden time of your life ( youth, passion, time, etc) and what you can expect and allow your partner to expect of yourself sexually. It does not mean you just have sex for fun and forget all the responsibilities. It's a way to know about your limits and yourself. It is clear that sex before marriage is beneficial for people, especially for love life. When you feel you are ready you can have sex its natural and beautiful thing. It is not an overstatement to say that experience is almost better than inexperience, you would have a essential component for real love connection in the future.
In
Possible spelling mistake found.
Viet
Nam,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
is believed
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to be beneficial for young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
“Although” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
generation in our country
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it is not necessary
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of traditional point of view. From my perspective, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
can maintain the relationship and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
great experiences for
Possible spelling mistake found.
lovelife
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Only
thing, you should have safe sex.

The main concern about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
is the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
love
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
based on attraction and romance. According to
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "research".
a research
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
scientish
in America, if mentally and
spiritually
you are close, wedding is in your souls and don't need official one to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the union unique.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sex
is
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and
above all
, a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
fusion when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to physical
really
proves that's the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
love
is deep. We can
therefore
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
beneficial to maintaining the flame if
The conjunction "if" requires the past participle "loved", or did you mean "you love"?
love
.

Furthermore
, I
strongly
believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sex
experiences can can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
your
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lovelife
Use only "better" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more better
than
Possible spelling mistake found.
anothers
by the way they explore it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
in safe measure.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
responsibility at the age 18 -25
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
struggling with life and trying to settle down with job and making home.
In addition
, you have wasted your golden time of your life
Don't put a space after the opening parenthesis
(
youth, passion, time, etc) and what you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
your partner to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
of yourself
sexually
. It does not mean you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sex
for fun and forget all the responsibilities. It's a way to know about your limits and yourself.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
It
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
is beneficial for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
especially
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
love
life. When you feel you are ready you can have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sex
its natural and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
thing. It is not an overstatement to say that experience is almost better than inexperience, you would have
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
essential component for real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
love
connection in the future.
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IELTS essay In VietNam, there are many opinions about whether sex before marriage would be beneficial or not. disscuss the topic and state your opinion.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
317 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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