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Some people believe that travelling by plane prefer by rich population, more ratio of people receive no benefits from this development of air travel as an industry. Do you agree or disagree.

Some people believe that travelling by plane prefer by rich population, more ratio of people receive no benefits from this development of air travel as an industry. q0ROX
Some individual think that travelling by plane prefer by richest person, more ratio of people can't get benefits from this development. I completely agree with this statement. On the one hand, middle and poor group of people only travel by local transportation like bus, car, train, however air transport is more expensive than other vehicles. To instead, other vehicles more comfortable and according to their budget. For example if air companies give discount or offers on tickets than middle group can travel by air. , however if they want to travel by air they have to save money from several months than they buy a air ticket. On the other hand, air travel prefer by richest people. To instead, because air tickets is expensive and they uses for business trips or if a company give them foreign trip than they travel by air with family and colleagues. In conclusion, I agree with this statement because air travel preferred by high state people because air ticket is more expensive. While air travel use for big business deals and foreign trips. However local transport more comfortable for middle and poor groups because it is according to their budget.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
individual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that travelling by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plane
prefer by richest person, more ratio of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
benefits from this development. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement. On the one hand, middle and poor group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
by local transportation like bus, car, train,
however
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
transport is more expensive than other vehicles. To
instead
, other vehicles more comfortable and according to their budget.
For example
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
give discount or offers on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
than middle group can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
.
Loose punctuation mark.
,
however
if they want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
save money from several months than they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ticket
.
On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
prefer by richest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. To
instead
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
is
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
expensive and
they
The pronoun 'they' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "use"
uses
for business trips or if a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
give them foreign trip than they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
with family and colleagues.
In conclusion
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
preferred by high state
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ticket
is more expensive. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
business deals and foreign trips.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
local transport more comfortable for middle and poor groups
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is according to their budget.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that travelling by plane prefer by rich population, more ratio of people receive no benefits from this development of air travel as an industry.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
196 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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