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,Some People Believe That They Should Keep All The Money They Have Earned

, Some People Believe That They Should Keep All The Money They Have Earned 3L5kb
Taxes are essential for the growth of the country. A few individuals believe that the government should not deduct taxes from their earnings. I completely disagree with this notion and firmly believe that citizens are entitled to pay taxes for the betterment of the country and for an enhanced standard of living. Firstly, it is a fact that every country runs on the taxes that are collected from their citizens. These taxes are collected for the construction of various facilities such as public transportation, medical facilities, universities, and so on. Indeed the taxes collected are used for the benefit of the public. For example, in countries like Canada and Australia, the citizens enjoy medical and primary education facilities for free, and this is possible only because their people contribute to the government in the form of taxes. Secondly, in some countries paying taxes is a way of saving for the retirement. The people of these countries enjoy retirement benefits from the government when they are aged. People hardly find well-paid jobs when they are above 60 and might earn only minimum wages; therefore, in such a situation, the pension that the government pays will be helpful. For example, in countries like Canada and Australia, the government provides retirement benefits to their citizens since they had paid taxes when they were working. To conclude, taxes are resources for the government to build the country and to ensure that their citizens have a good standard of living. People also require facilities like hospitals, universities and robust transportation systems and to build them the government needs money and taxes are the primary source of income for the government. Do you have an essay on this topic? Submit it below in the comments for a free band score estimate.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Taxes
are essential for the growth of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. A few individuals believe that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should not deduct
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
from their earnings. I completely disagree with this notion and
firmly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
are entitled
to pay
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
for the betterment of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and for an enhanced standard of living.

Firstly
, it is a fact that every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
runs on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
that
are collected
from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
are collected
for the construction of various facilities such as public transportation, medical facilities, universities, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Indeed
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
collected are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for the benefit of the public.
For example
, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
like Canada and Australia, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
enjoy medical and primary education facilities for free, and this is possible
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
contribute to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
in the form of taxes.

Secondly
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
paying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
is a way of saving for the retirement. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
enjoy retirement benefits from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
when they
are aged
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
hardly find well-paid jobs when they are above 60 and might earn
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
minimum wages;
therefore
, in such a situation, the pension that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
pays will be helpful.
For example
, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
like Canada and Australia, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
provides retirement benefits to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
since they had paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
when they were working.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
are resources for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to build the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and to ensure that their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
standard of living.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
also
require facilities like hospitals, universities and robust transportation systems and to build them the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
needs money and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
are the primary source of income for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.

Do you have an essay on this topic? Submit it below in the comments for a free band score estimate.
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IELTS essay , Some People Believe That They Should Keep All The Money They Have Earned

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
295 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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