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Some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for each type of crime. Others However, argue that circumstances of an individual crime and the motivation for committing it, should always be taken into account. Discuss both side and give your opinion v.18

Some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for each type of crime. Others However, argue that circumstances of an individual crime and the motivation for committing it, should always be taken into account. 18
Fixed punishment for different kind of crimes has become a debatable topic among citizens and legislators. While many people believe that criminals should be given the same penalty for all crimes, others argue that various circumstances and multiple motivations should be taken in consideration when assign a sentence. This essay will discuss both views in depth and why I completely disagree with similar punishment. There are enormous reasons to reject this proposition. First, although committing a crime is considered as a heinous behaviour that who committed should be given a considerable punishment, I believe that each crime has its conditions, background as well as different motivations that induce offenders to execute a certain action. Thus, the law books differentiate between crimes and punishments. For example, an individual, who defended himself from an armed thief and accidentally killed him should not be sentenced as a husband who killed his wife with full intention. Secondly, it is not fair to punish children, who in many cases are not aware of their actions as adults. In short, judgments must review all of these factors and take them into account before the verdict announcement. In the other hand, some of the beliefs encourage a fixed punishment system in order to obtain equality and to minimize discrimination among diverse groups. For instance, this method can ensure justice and equal rights for both black and white criminals in the USA. Moreover, by selecting this model of punishment, the judicial system efficiency will certainly increase due to the declined efforts of reviewing cases. In other words, adapting this way of retribution will not only protect equality principles, but also will provide a realistic solution to the court’s burden. In conclusion, this essay discussed the advantages and disadvantages of fixed punishment for each type of crime. While there are several benefits of this system, I strongly believe that examination each crime’s circumstance and motivation is crucial to determine penalization.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Fixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
has become a debatable topic among citizens and legislators. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that criminals should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the same penalty for all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
, others argue that various circumstances and multiple motivations should
be taken
in consideration when assign a sentence. This essay will discuss both views in depth and why I completely disagree with similar punishment.

There are enormous reasons to reject this proposition.
First
, although committing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
is considered
as a heinous
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
committed should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
a considerable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
, I believe that each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
has its conditions, background
as well
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
motivations that induce offenders to execute a certain action.
Thus
, the law books differentiate between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishments
.
For example
, an individual,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
defended himself from an armed thief and
accidentally
killed him should not
be sentenced
as a husband
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
killed his wife with full intention.
Secondly
, it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
to punish children,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cases are not aware of their actions as adults. In short, judgments
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
review all of these factors and take them into account
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
the verdict announcement.

In the other hand,
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
beliefs encourage a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
system in order to obtain equality and to minimize discrimination among diverse groups.
For instance
, this method can ensure justice and equal rights for both black and white criminals in the USA.
Moreover
, by selecting this model of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
, the judicial system efficiency will
certainly
increase due to the declined efforts of reviewing cases.
In other words
, adapting this way of retribution will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
protect equality principles,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
will provide a realistic solution to the court’s burden.

In conclusion
, this essay discussed the advantages and disadvantages of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
for each type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
. While there are several benefits of this system, I
strongly
believe that examination each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime’s
circumstance and motivation is crucial to determine penalization.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for each type of crime. Others However, argue that circumstances of an individual crime and the motivation for committing it, should always be taken into account. 18

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
321 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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