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some people believe that the younger generation of women are dressing excessively provocatively. what extent do you agree

some people believe that the younger generation of women are dressing excessively provocatively. what extent do you agree Klk70
Fashion is one of the common issues that society often mentions. Due to the fact that, some people believe that the younger generation of women are dressing excessively provocatively. Personally, I partially agree with this opinion. In the following writings, I will present some evidence to support my thinking. It is true that some people are very confident about their body so they want to wear bold clothes to show their beauty. They want to be noticed and admired every time they see them appear. This is often seen in famous people such as singers or actors. Although in some countries there is a strict dress code when on television, many countries do not care much about it. In addition, it's also possible because it's their profession, like modeling. They are required to often wear provocative clothing and that is completely understandable. On the other hand, it's not exactly that the young women dress revealingly, but because the older generation is too strict about fashion. For example, grandparents often complain about the shortness of their granddaughter's clothes, but that's because they're used to wearing long pants and can't accept wearing formal shorts or leggings. Normally, this problem only happens with the grandparents generation but for parents it is easier with dress but of course can't be too provocative because they are worried others will judge their child inappropriately. Personally, I think people should have freedom in dress but it should be limited and appropriate to the situation, and the event. That's because it also shows respect to the person you meet. For example, when you go out with friends, you can dress as you like, but when you are visiting grandparents, you should dress more modestly to show respect to them. Besides, when you go to some special places like when going to the temple, you have to dress modestly and can't be provocative. In conclusion, we need to dress appropriately for the people and circumstances in which we attend. With a traditional country like Vietnam, we should not limit ourselves to wearing provocative clothes when appearing.
Fashion is one of the common issues that society
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
mentions. Due to the fact that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that the younger generation of women are dressing
excessively
provocatively
.
Personally
, I
partially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this opinion. In the following writings, I will present
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
evidence to support my thinking.

It is true that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
confident about their body
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they want to wear bold clothes to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their beauty. They want to
be noticed
and admired every time they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
them appear. This is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
such as singers or actors. Although in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries there is a strict
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dress
code when on television,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries do not care much about it.
In addition
, it's
also
possible
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it's their profession, like modeling. They
are required
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
wear provocative clothing and
that is
completely understandable.

On the other hand
, it's not exactly that the young women
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dress
revealingly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the older generation is too strict about fashion.
For example
, grandparents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
complain about the shortness of their granddaughter's clothes,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
that's
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they're
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to wearing long pants and can't accept wearing formal shorts or leggings.
Normally
, this problem
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
happens with the
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "grandparents'" or "grandparent's"?
grandparents
generation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
for parents it is easier with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dress
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
of course
can't be too provocative
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
are worried
others will judge their child
inappropriately
.

Personally
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should have freedom in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dress
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it should
be limited
and appropriate to the situation, and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
. That's
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
respect to the person you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
.
For example
, when you go out with friends, you can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dress
as you like,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
when you are visiting grandparents, you should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dress
more
modestly
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
respect to them.
Besides
, when you go to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
special places like when going to the temple, you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dress
modestly
and can't be provocative.

In conclusion
, we need to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dress
appropriately
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and circumstances in which we attend. With a traditional country like Vietnam, we should not limit ourselves to wearing provocative clothes when appearing.
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IELTS essay some people believe that the younger generation of women are dressing excessively provocatively. what extent do you agree

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
347 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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