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Some people believe that the most important aspect of their job is their salary. Others think that the job itself is the most important. What do you think is the most important aspect of a job? Include specific details and examples to support your choice

Some people believe that the most important aspect of their job is their salary. Others think that the job itself is the most important. What do you think is the most important aspect of a job? Include specific details and examples to support your choice JXBB
Money being the priority for considering any job, there are more aspects that are important as well. There are people those believe that salary is the most important aspect, on the other hand, some people believe that job itself is the most important aspect. In m opinion job itself is the most important aspect. Let's say, If a person lands their dream job in their dream company, irrespective of the salary offered, that person should accept that job offer because, even at a low pay scale that person would have a stable mental health which the money could not provide. Although, Talking about a person earning well but does not have the passion for that job, that person will never be at mental peace. This person would not be able to perform as expected from him, the person would make the work as well as the environment of their house hostile, whereas, A person having the job for which he has a zeal to go into the workplace every morning with an enthusiasm, will make the environment of the workplace as well as their house pleasent. Some people believe if they are offered a high salary job they should undoubtedly bag that job, on the contrary, I believe if a person weighs all the options and aspects they have in their mind they should choose job where they will have mental peace. Say, A person doing an overnight job does not get to sleep in the day due to some reasons and has to continue work for the money the company offers, that person would be exhausted and will not be able to perform well at their job and will not be able to maintain good relationship with their family, Then what is the benefit of having a high paid job. To conclude, Some people believe having a high salary is the most important aspect whereas, I stand by my opinion that job itself is the most important aspect to choose a job.
Money being the priority for considering any
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job
, there are more
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aspects
that are
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important
as
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well
. There are
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people
those
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believe
that
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salary
is the most
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important
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aspect
,
on the other hand
,
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some
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people
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believe
that
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job
itself is the most
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important
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aspect
. In m opinion
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job
itself is the most
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important
aspect.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
's say, If a
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person
lands their dream
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job
in their dream
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
, irrespective of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
offered, that
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person
should accept that
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job
offer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, even at a low pay scale that
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person
would have a stable mental health which the money could not provide.

Although, Talking about a
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person
earning
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well
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
does not have the passion for that
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job
, that
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person
will never be at mental peace. This
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person
would not be able to perform as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
from him, the
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person
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the work as
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well
as the environment of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
hostile, whereas, A
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person
having the
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job
for which he has a zeal to go into the workplace every morning with an enthusiasm, will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the environment of the workplace as
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well
as their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
Possible spelling mistake found.
pleasent
.

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Some
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people
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believe
if they
are offered
a high
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salary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
they should
undoubtedly
bag that
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job
,
on the contrary
, I
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believe
if a
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person
weighs all the options and
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aspects
they have in their mind they should choose
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job
where they will have mental peace. Say, A
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person
doing an overnight
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job
does not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to sleep in the day due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
continue work for the money the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
offers, that
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person
would
be exhausted
and will not be able to perform
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well
at their
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job
and will not be able to maintain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
relationship with their family, Then what is the benefit of having a high paid job.

To conclude
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
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people
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believe
having a high
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salary
is the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aspect
whereas, I stand by my opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
itself is the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aspect
to choose a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that the most important aspect of their job is their salary. Others think that the job itself is the most important. What do you think is the most important aspect of a job? Include specific details and examples to support your choice

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
333 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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