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Some people believe that the best way to increase road sfatey is to increase the minimum age of drivers to what extend you agree and disagree

Over the last few decades there have been a significance surge inn road traffic accidents. Certain people think that, it is necessary to alleviate the minimum age of driving cars in order to ensure the road safety. I strongly agree with this view and the reasons are discussed in the following paragraphs. Firstly, young people drive vehicles especially cars without understanding the traffic rules and regulations. To elucidate further, though they have license to drivefoir wheelers, they specially adolescents may not aware of traffic signals. Thereby they wrong turn which ended up in road traffic accidents. For example, a research conducted in 2015 among patients who met with accidents reported that the incidence has occurred due to lack of knowledge of road signals by the young drivers. Therefore, to secure the road safety and life of others, it is necessary to raise the minimum age of drivers. Secondly, competition among drivers are the next growing concern. To explain it further, teenagers has competitive mind as compared to all other age group. Moreover, they drive cars in maximum speed and provoke other drivers by chasing them and this competition cause perilous situation in roads. For instance, in Saudi Arabia, the rate of accidents soar drastically in couple of years because, children age above 12 drive cars in maximum speed even without seeing the roads properly and they competate with other drivers as well. Therefore, government in each country should take initiativeness to increase the minimum age of drivers to reduce the accidents and to secure safety in roads. To recapitulate, road safety has reduced due to increased number of young drivers as they lack knowledge of traffic rules and also due to over speed. This can be controlled by taking applying punishments for the one who violate the rules.
Over the last few decades there have been a significance surge inn
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road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
. Certain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that, it is necessary to alleviate the minimum
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age
of driving
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cars
in order to ensure the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
. I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this view and the reasons
are discussed
in the following paragraphs.

Firstly
, young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
drive vehicles
especially
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
without understanding the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations. To elucidate
further
, though they have license to
Possible spelling mistake found.
drivefoir
wheelers, they
specially
adolescents may not aware of
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traffic
signals. Thereby they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
turn which ended up in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
.
For example
,
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply “research”.
a research
conducted in 2015 among patients who met with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
reported that the incidence has occurred due to lack of knowledge of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
signals by the young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drivers
.
Therefore
, to secure the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
and life of others, it is necessary to raise the minimum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of drivers.

Secondly
, competition among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drivers
are the
next
growing concern. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
it
further
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
has competitive mind as compared to all
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other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
group.
Moreover
, they drive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
in maximum speed and provoke
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drivers
by chasing them and this competition cause perilous situation in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
.
For instance
, in Saudi Arabia, the rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
soar
drastically
in
It seems that an article is missing.
couple of
years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
above 12 drive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
in maximum speed even without seeing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
properly
and they
Possible spelling mistake found.
competate
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drivers
as well
.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
in each country should take
Possible spelling mistake found.
initiativeness
to increase the minimum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drivers
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
and to secure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
in roads.

To recapitulate,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
due to increased number of young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drivers
as they lack knowledge of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and
also
due to over speed. This can
be controlled
by taking applying punishments for the one who violate the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that the best way to increase road sfatey is to increase the minimum age of drivers to what extend you agree and disagree

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
298 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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