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Some people believe that Technology such as mobile phones, cell phones are destroying social interaction. Do you agree or disagree? v.3

The drastic enhancement in the digital world has a detrimental effect on society. In the present times, some would argue that mobile phones have ruined the way of socialization. In my opinion, I completely support this viewpoint because it has created barriers within family relations and a loss of cultural values. Cell phones are acting as a hurdle between family members. In other words, if a person is facing any difficulty in his life, he considers sharing on social media via a mobile device rather than talking with blood relations, which is creating conflicts inside a family. By this, technology is affecting the mind-set of a human to interact with others. For instance, in many developed nations, the parents are concerned about a lack of communication with their children. Due to teenagers feel comfortable talking through digitally only. Hence, the gap is increasing between them. Additionally, one of the consequences of the new media age is a loss of traditional worth. To elaborate, in ancient times, people used to visit their relatives' home on special occasions to greet them. However, in the digital era, they prefer to do a phone call and wish them. By virtue of this, the earlier etiquettes are getting extinct. Face-to-face interaction is rarely seen nowadays because of lots of applications on smart mobiles. These gadgets not only allow make voice calls but also allow users to do video calls. Therefore, the traditional way of social interaction is getting disappear due to smart gadgets accessibility. In conclusion, it is often argued that the way of communication has been destroyed by cell phones. In my view, I totally agree with this statement owing to it has made blocks within family members and extinction of cultures.
The drastic enhancement in the digital world has a detrimental effect on society. In the present times,
some
would argue that mobile
phones
have ruined the way of socialization. In my opinion, I completely support this viewpoint
because
it has created barriers within
family
relations and a loss of cultural values.

Cell
phones
are acting as a hurdle between
family
members.
In other words
, if a person is facing any difficulty in his life, he considers sharing on social media via a mobile device
rather
than talking with blood relations, which is creating conflicts inside a
family
. By this, technology is affecting the mind-set of a human to interact with others.
For instance
, in
many
developed nations, the parents
are concerned
about a lack of communication with their children. Due to
teenagers
feel comfortable talking through
digitally
only
.
Hence
, the gap is increasing between them.

Additionally
, one of the consequences of the new media age is a loss of traditional worth. To elaborate, in ancient times,
people
used
to visit their relatives' home on special occasions to greet them.
However
, in the digital era, they prefer to do a
phone
call and wish them. By virtue of this, the earlier
etiquettes
are getting extinct. Face-to-face interaction is rarely
seen
nowadays
because
of lots of applications on smart mobiles. These gadgets not
only
allow
make
voice calls
but
also
allow
users to do video calls.
Therefore
, the traditional way of social interaction is getting disappear due to smart
gadgets
accessibility.

In conclusion
, it is
often
argued that the way of communication has been
destroyed
by cell
phones
. In my view, I
totally
agree
with this statement owing to it has made blocks within
family
members and extinction of cultures.
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The man who does not know other languages, unless he is a man of genius, necessarily has deficiencies in his ideas.
Victor Hugo

IELTS essay Some people believe that smart phones are destroying social interaction today.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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