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Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child's development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion.

In the contemporary era, education is the most imperative asset for offspring's growth. However there are predominantly two contrasting views where a section of society vehemently deems that educate pupils at home is leading for their progress while other emphasize that it is necessary to send them to educational institutes. In this essay I will analyze both the points before a reasonable conclusion. Apparently, various factors makes a section of people advocate that their home is good for their blooming and have many reasons to substantiate it. As home is their first school, they can learn all the basic things like speaking, manners and behaving. For instance, they can share their every weakness to their parent without any fear and their parents will act like teachers to overcome that and provide them excellent solutions. In this way, student can learn in fast pace while they are in their comfortable zone. On the other hand, some believe that it is prominent for pupils to go to school for myriad reasons. School plays an important role in the students development as they provide them technical knowledge along with manners and just basic habits that help them to survive in the today’s competitive world. They provide them playgrounds and essential play kit for their physical development too. For example, In schools a child has to study many languages together with subjects like science and mathematics that is basic need to survive in the market. Even schools educate them using modern techniques like giving realistic examples on 3-D videos or provide them chemicals to do experiments in lab. They provide open ground to them to learn different sports and conduct competitions every year to gain their interest in sports activities and make them physically fit. In this way, schools are necessary for their mental and physical development. To conclude, parents plays a big role in their off springs development but it is necessary to send them to schools for their overall development because parents cannot provide all the resources to them at home. Schools should make attendance compulsory for the growth and development of future generation.
In the contemporary era, education is the most imperative asset for offspring's growth.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
there are
predominantly
two contrasting views where a section of society
vehemently
deems that educate pupils at home is leading for their progress while other emphasize that it is necessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
them to educational institutes. In this essay I will analyze both the points
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
a reasonable conclusion.

Apparently
, various factors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
a section of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
advocate that their home is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for their blooming and have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons to substantiate it. As home is their
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, they can learn all the basic things like speaking, manners and behaving.
For instance
, they can share their every weakness to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent
without any fear and their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
will act like teachers to overcome that and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
them excellent solutions. In this way, student can learn in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
pace while they are in their comfortable zone.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believe that it is prominent for pupils to go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
for myriad reasons.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
School
plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in the
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "students'" or "student's"?
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
as they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
them technical knowledge along with manners and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
basic habits that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to survive in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s competitive world. They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
them playgrounds and essential play kit for their physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
too.
For example
, In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
a child
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
study
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
languages together with subjects like science and mathematics
that is
basic need to survive in the market. Even
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
educate them using modern techniques like giving realistic examples on 3-D videos or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
them chemicals to do experiments in lab. They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
open ground to them to learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
sports and conduct competitions every year to gain their interest in sports activities and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them
physically
fit. In this way,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
are necessary for their mental and physical development.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
plays a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
role in their off springs
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is necessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
for their
overall
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
cannot
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
all the resources to them at home.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Schools
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
attendance compulsory for the growth and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of future generation.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child's development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
352 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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