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Some people believe that success comes from hard work others believe that success has to do with luck. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that success comes from hard work others believe that success has to do with luck. b36yW
A few persons think that by the hard working, it easier to get success, other depend on luck. Although, work requires on both sides and also some it depends on person's perception, hard working can change the bad luck. In my further paragraphs with my prospective I prove it. On the one hand, as per experience person perspection difficulties always teach us how to achieve success. Furthermore, if businessman never do business by themself then how he can learn competition and challenges, though he belong from business family. Therefore, when person on a success way by his hard working during that time he never believed in luck. For example, I got my result as I did my heart study without think about luck and obtain my higher band in IELTS exam. Additionally, in that way person have to face to numerous of hurdles. Moreover, either people got success or got some knowledge regarding obstacles. On the other hand, whom depend on luck, they never show their ability. In the other words, although, some works are happened by the luck like scientific invention, result, It also requires positive confidence in theirs activity which directly motivate to them towards the goal. Thus, who one think and wait for result on behalf of luck more than 40% of people are nervous now. For instance, if Mr. Newton had stopped their invention and just believe in the luck then how can world seen bright of bulfs. So, Newton decided made mental not dependent on luck that's why he tried again and again. In my opinion, luck is good thing but overconfidence, its terrible for our aspect of life problems. To sum up, hard work or luck both has different path for accomplished goal. Most people choose hard work rather than becoming a dependent on luck.
A few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
persons
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that by the
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
hard working
,
It seems that a verb is missing after "it". Please verify.
it
easier to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
, other depend on luck. Although,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
requires on both sides and
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
it depends on person's perception,
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
hard working
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
luck. In my
further
paragraphs with my prospective I prove it.

On the one hand, as per experience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
Possible spelling mistake found.
perspection
difficulties always teach us how to achieve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
.
Furthermore
, if businessman never do business by
The term is non-standard and not widely accepted.
themself
then how he can learn competition and challenges, though he
The pronoun 'he' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "belongs", "belonged".
belong
from business family.
Therefore
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
on a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
way by his
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
hard working
during that time he never believed in luck.
For example
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
my result as I did my heart study without
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about luck and obtain my higher band in IELTS exam.
Additionally
, in that way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
face to numerous of hurdles.
Moreover
, either
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
knowledge regarding obstacles.

On the other hand
, whom depend on luck, they never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their ability. In the other words, although,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
works
are happened
by the luck like scientific invention, result, It
also
requires
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
confidence in theirs activity which
directly
motivate to them towards the goal.
Thus
, who one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
and wait for result on behalf of luck more than 40% of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are nervous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
.
For instance
, if Mr. Newton had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stopped
their invention and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
believe in the luck then how can world
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
bright of
Possible spelling mistake found.
bulfs
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, Newton decided made mental not dependent on luck that's why he tried again and again.

In my opinion, luck is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
thing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
overconfidence, its terrible for our aspect of life problems.

To sum up,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or luck both has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
path for accomplished goal. Most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
choose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
rather
than becoming a dependent on luck.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that success comes from hard work others believe that success has to do with luck.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
301 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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