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Some people believe that reducing speed limits is the best option for road safety improvement. Do you think there are other measures that could put in place? What are advantages and disadvantages of this? v.1

Some people believe that reducing speed limits is the best option for road safety improvement. Do you think there are other measures that could put in place? What are advantages and disadvantages of this? v. 1
Recruiters currently tend to favour candidates who have formal academic qualifications over those with only life experiences or personal attributes. Although the trend occurs for several reasons, this may have an adverse influence on our society. To begin with, there are two main reasons why people opt for a degree than experience. First, candidates with scholastic qualifications are believed to be equipped with in-depth knowledge and useful skills, which are necessary for future jobs. For instance, a candidate for the biology teacher position is required to have a great deal of knowledge at university as well as spend a lot of time to practice and carry out experiments, which can somehow prove through medical study qualifications. In addition, selecting the candidate base on the common criteria certificate may significantly diminish the time to tailor the suitable applicants for the position. As a result, recruiters presumably equate academic qualifications to excellent credentials for the occupation, leading to higher efficiency and greater contributions to the company. On the other hand, personal skills and life experience also play a pivotal role in the recruitment process. First and foremost, a degree does not signal whether a person possesses essential personal traits such as discipline, self-confidence and responsibility. Such personalities of employees are the needs for a great working-environment and the sustainable of the organization. Furthermore, since employees have a penchant for over-relying on their formal academic knowledge and lack of skills, they consequently devote tremendous effort in dealing with their clients in real-life predicaments and might not crises as effectively as those with life experience. In conclusion, the priority of formal academic qualifications over life experience or personal characteristics in the recruitment process has been widely highlighted as an emerging issue for many reasons. However, hiring authorities of a company should reach the balance between social skills and other important qualifications for the job.
Recruiters
currently
tend to
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
candidates
who have formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualifications
over those with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
attributes. Although the trend occurs for several reasons, this may have an adverse influence on our society.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are two main reasons why
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
opt for a degree than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
.
First
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
candidates
with scholastic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualifications
are believed
to
be equipped
with in-depth knowledge and useful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
, which are necessary for future jobs.
For instance
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
candidate
for the biology teacher position
is required
to have a great deal of knowledge at university
as well
as spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
time to practice and carry out experiments, which can somehow prove through medical study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualifications
.
In addition
, selecting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
candidate
base on the common criteria certificate may
significantly
diminish the time to tailor the suitable applicants for the position.
As a result
, recruiters presumably equate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualifications
to excellent credentials for the occupation, leading to higher efficiency and greater contributions to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
also
play a pivotal role in the recruitment process.
First
and foremost, a degree does not signal whether a person possesses essential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
traits such as discipline, self-confidence and responsibility. Such personalities of employees are the needs for a great working-environment and
The phrase 'the sustainable of' is not correct. Use a noun, not an adjective, between 'the' and 'of'.
the sustainable of
the organization.
Furthermore
, since employees have a penchant for over-relying on their formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
knowledge and lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
, they
consequently
devote tremendous effort in dealing with their clients in real-life predicaments and might not crises as
effectively
as those with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
experience.

In conclusion
, the priority of formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualifications
over
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
characteristics in the recruitment process has been
widely
highlighted as an emerging issue for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons.
However
, hiring authorities of a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
should reach the balance between social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
and other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualifications
for the job.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that reducing speed limits is the best option for road safety improvement. Do you think there are other measures that could put in place? What are advantages and disadvantages of this? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
310 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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