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Some people believe that mathematics is better taught using computers. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that mathematics is better taught using computers. n17BP
The advance of technologies is increasing nowadays. Computers have become important for people to do their activities. Computers are also used in education. Educators have been calling to reform and look for effective approaches to boost student mathematics performance, and the answer is the use of educational technology (Cheung and Slavin, 2011, p. 2). Some people believe that mathematics is better taught using computers. I agree with this and think that mathematics is better taught using computers. First of all, students can learn mathematics effectively. Teachers can help students learn mathematics using computers with interesting methods. Olkun et al (2005, p. 317) found that students who did not have computers at home initially had lower geometry scores. Therefore, Olkun (2005, p. 317) suggests that in schools, it seems more effective to integrate mathematical content and technology in a manner that enables students to do playful mathematical discoveries. It is easier for students to understand mathematics when teachers use playful methods, such as games. Students feel more motivated to learn mathematics using computer games. For example, when an elementary student has a lesson about mathematics in traditional ways, he usually doesn't give attention and has difficulty in understanding. He also gets bored. But, when an elementary student has a lesson by playing a game, he will give attention and be more motivated to learn. Secondly, digitalisation happens in many aspects of life. Computers are used for running a plenty of industries in the world. A lot of people will be using a computer to do all the work in their future job. Other than that, mathematics is fundamental for many professions, such as science, technology, etc. Therefore, mathematics that is taught using computers can make students more adaptable with their job in the future. This statement is strengthened by Oppenheimer’s (1997, p. 31) statement in which he says that "I believe that the computer as a writing instrument offers children an opportunity to become more like adults, indeed like advanced professionals, in their relationships to other intellectual products and to themselves". So, mathematics that is taught using computers will help students for their future. For example, in Europe, students who taught mathematics using computers are familiar with using computers. So, the result is they should be able to use computers when they have to work in data science. In conclusion, as can be seen from the arguments above, mathematics is better taught using computers so that students can learn mathematics effectively and help them to adapt for their future too.
The advance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
is increasing nowadays. Computers have become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to do their activities. Computers are
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in education. Educators have been calling to reform and look for effective approaches to boost
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
performance, and the answer is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of educational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
(
Possible spelling mistake found.
Cheung
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Slavin
, 2011, p. 2).
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
is better taught using computers. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
is better taught using computers.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
effectively
. Teachers can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
using computers with interesting methods.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Olkun
A dot is missing here: "et al."
et al
(2005, p. 317) found that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who did not have computers at home
initially
had lower geometry scores.
Therefore
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Olkun
(2005, p. 317) suggests that in schools, it seems more effective to integrate mathematical content and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
in a manner that enables
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to do playful mathematical discoveries. It is easier for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to understand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
when teachers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
playful methods, such as games.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
feel more motivated to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
using computer games.
For example
, when an elementary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
has a lesson about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
in traditional ways, he
usually
doesn't give attention and has difficulty in understanding. He
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
bored.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, when an elementary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
has a lesson by playing a game, he will give attention and be more motivated to learn.

Secondly
,
Possible spelling mistake. 'digitalisation' is British English.
digitalisation
happens in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
aspects of life. Computers are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for running a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of industries in the world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
A lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will be using a computer to do all the work in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
job. Other than that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
is fundamental for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
professions, such as science,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, etc.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
that
is taught
using computers can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
more adaptable with their job in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
. This statement
is strengthened
by Oppenheimer’s (1997, p. 31) statement in which he says that
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
I believe that the computer as a writing instrument offers children an opportunity to become more like adults,
indeed
like advanced professionals, in their relationships to other intellectual products and to themselves
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
that
is taught
using computers will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
.
For example
, in Europe,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who taught
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
using computers are familiar with using computers.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, the result is they should be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
computers when they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
work in data science.

In conclusion
, as can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
from the arguments above,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
is better taught using computers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mathematics
effectively
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to adapt for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
too.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that mathematics is better taught using computers.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
419 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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